


He’s a choice...

by AwkwardDesigns_13



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Ballroom Dancing, Courting Rituals, Descent into Madness, Flirting, Good Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), How Do I Tag, I'm Sorry, Multi, No gender description, Not Beta Read, One-Sided Relationship, Other, Toxic Relationship, no editing, no y/n
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:48:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 40,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28377222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwkwardDesigns_13/pseuds/AwkwardDesigns_13
Summary: This is a fic I wrote specifically for my fiancé, and the tiktok they showed me of your life if you chose Jschlatt. I got hooked.We both simp for schlatt so I hope they approve
Relationships: Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF)/You, Wilbur Soot/Reader, jschlatt/reader
Comments: 172
Kudos: 411





	1. The meeting

A large ballroom, too many people, music fading in and out, and a glass of champagne in your palm. That was your night. Awful, really. Even your friends had abandoned you tonight, intent on finding some much better entertainment, and much less stuffy company. 

You were stuck, however, in more ways than one. Your family had hosted the event, you were in too tight a corset to do much more than dance and sip on champagne, and your parents wanted you to meet someone. A new noble joining court? Or maybe some merchant from the sea. You weren’t interested in the slightest.

A voice pulls you from your reverie and you look up to see your parents, about ready to drag you onto the floor. You would run to the doors but you had already made eye contact, much too late to run. Before you can even take more than a step, you spot the man stood next to them. 

He was tall, and scruffy in a way you hadn’t seen in these halls in a while. Even as he stood there, conversing with guests, he had a certain level of easy confidence. It was irritating, but not nearly enough that you would challenge your parents on meeting him. As you approach he grins and his eyes twinkle with mirth before giving you a wink. 

It startles you a touch, but you manage a polite smile before greeting your parents first. The proper way to do things, they gesture to your guest with bright smiles and introduce him as “Sir J. Schlatt.” An odd name, but it’s easy enough to remember as you curtsy and offer your hand.

“The pleasure is all mine,” he bows and pecks the ring on your hand, eyes never leaving yours, “little one, you must be the child your parents told me so much about. I’ve been in contact with them about my wares, but they never told me you were so attractive.” 

Your face flushes but you cover it quickly with your drink and look to your parents for help. They just titter on about how kind he is, and well mannered for a merchant. You realize you have to respond, and that the pause you have left hanging is awkward.

“Well, I’m sorry to say I have heard very little if anything of you. Are you well acquainted with many locals that may have mentioned you? My parents don’t share anything with me.” The remark makes him laugh, covering it with a cough as your parents start to realize, “but I must say, you do seem quite the decent sort, Sir Schlatt.”

“Just call me Schlatt, or J if you think we are that close already.”

“Alright then Schlatt.” He laughs again, “I would much like to make my way to the refreshments if you want to continue our conversation?” You offer, anyone with a laugh like that was worth talking to in your books, and he was easy to talk to. Like your other local friends, outside of court.

He nods with another grin and offers his arm. You wave off your parents and they smile excited back, hoping you were looking at him as a suitor. It wasn’t like you were, but it wasn’t like you weren’t either. He was…. Nice, you supposed. At least nice enough to let him talk while you drank.

When you come back from your thoughts Schlatt is talking again, something something, his boat is huge, something, your parents were buying so much…. a real snooze, until he realizes you aren’t paying attention.

“Hey, little one? Are you falling asleep on me here? Cause I don’t mind a hot piece of ass like you falling asleep on me, but at least let me sit down first,” you snort and slap your hand over her mouth to keep the noise from happening again.

“Oh? You find that funny? Cause I got plenty more where that came from. I gotta have a lot, for dumbasses like you who like to fall asleep when a catch like me is telling a story,” he goes on and on and this time has your attention. The way he could speak like that and not care who heard, just to make you smile? You could swoon. But no. No swooning now.

“I’m not falling asleep, I promise Schlatt. That would be impolite, and besides, I’m not that far into drinks yet. Though if you are entertaining enough I might find myself asleep on your shoulder.” He laughs again, and you find yourself smiling with him, a soft giggle escaping.

“Then I suppose I’ll have to keep up my jokes for my favorite broad in this place.” He winks and grabs a glass for you and shakes his head when they try to offer another. Your cheeks warm again but you hope the drinking is a viable excuse. 

“You better, I’m already bored enough as it is. All my friends are playing cards in the inn uptown.” he nods as you take a long drink. “but I suppose it was worth missing out to meet some of the new guests”

“Oh really? Like who?” He teases with a shit eating grin, leaning forward into your space, not that you mind, it only made your smile widden. 

“Oh, Lady Niki is awful sweet. And I’ve heard Dukes Sapnap and George are just over there,” you point in some vague direction with a teasing wink of your own, letting him know your only goal was to rile him up, and possibly make him laugh again.

“I see how it is, offer to sleep on a man you just met, but nooooo. I’m not the most interesting person here.” He nudges your shoulder and smiles softly, “I still think you’re the most gorgeous one here, by the way.”

This blush you can hide as it crawls up your cheeks to your ears and neck. It’s blotchy and he laughs, in a kind way. It’s not mean or teasing, it’s sweet. And you find your heart pang. Maybe you could convince your parents to keep him at the villa for a week or two… become his patrons…. and he’s speaking again.

“-I really wish your parents had told me, from the letters they sent I thought you were a toddler, and I’m not much for kids. I mean, I definitely don’t flirt with them, so seeing you the way you are,” he gestures to you, “I mean, come on! They had to have known I was gonna, you’re a babe- are you even listening?” You smile softly and nod, the wine filling your head with fog as your eyes begin to droop,

“Nuh Uh, we are dancing at least once before you pass out and I have to carry you.” He laughs and offers his hand as the band strikes up a slow foxtrot rhythm. It was a simple dance and it could be an opportunity to show Schlatt up.

You glide to the floor and his hand cups your shoulder blade, pulling you closer than exactly appropriate, but neither of you mind as he immediately starts leading you backwards into the line of dance.

The music fades to a dull thrum as you can’t manage to tear your eyes from his, you weren’t even supposed to look at him in proper form, but it was hard to look away from his teasing smile and warm eyes. You couldn’t hide, so staring back was your only defense.

“Do you sweep every attractive person off their feet like this or am I special?” You tease in a soft whisper.

“Only the lucky ones get foxtrot, I’m more of a tango guy.”

“Ah, so I suppose I should consider myself lucky.” He leads you into a turn and back into his arms,

“Very lucky little one, I don't see why you shouldn’t consider yourself the luckiest here. I ain’t danced with any of these other broads, and I don’t plan on it. I got a hot date with a napping hottie later and I wouldn’t miss it for anything.” You laugh and tuck your head into his shoulder to keep from snorting. Unknown to you he flushes and smiles goofily down at you.

As the music swells you dance and laugh along with each other, the movement easy, as if you had danced together for a long time. Everyone could see how easy it was for you two, and a few were even jealous. They music crests and he leads you into a turn and dips you right as the last note hits.

You both pant softly and stare at each other, seemingly stuck in the same spot, unable to turn away or break the moment. Good lord, you were stuck again. But you suppose you don’t mind it. This time. Especially when his hand tightens on your waist and his tongue peeks out to wet his lip. 

You blink and turn when the next song interrupts the moment. He helps you up and you take his arm to be lead of the dance floor. With the moment gone your head seemed a bit less cloudy and you can’t help but bite the inside of your cheek to reprimand yourself. No swooning. And no more getting stuck. 

You supposed now would be good as ever to ask him to stay. It wasn’t like your parents would mind….


	2. A good nights rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Uh, I’m not good at an uploading schedule, but I’ll try to have a chapter a week? And hopefully 1-2k words. This was fun to write though

The event had closed within the next few hours. It wasn’t any big deal event that lasted days on end, goodness no. You would have stabbed someone by the second evening if that was the case. Stabbing people wasn’t very polite, in your parents opinion, not that that had stopped you from planning quite a few failed attempts during past events.

This one might have not ended so badly though. With Sir Schlatt you had spent the evening, keeping each other company amidst the insanity that was eligible spouses. They both were quite the catch in the eyes of many a guest, and the fact that they kept each other’s attention away made a few jealous. You had been pulled away once or thrice to make sure your dance card was not only filled with the same two initials.

It’s not like you minded. Schlatt made it very easy to dance. Not pushing or pulling, but not a weak lead either. A few of the closer dances had cause your cheeks to heat and he couldn’t stop a comment or two from slipping out to tease.

“Is it hot in here, or is it just us?”

“I swear you rival the sun with how bright your fuckin cheeks are”

“Are you gonna blame that on the drinks again?”

“If you blush and look away again little one, I swear I’m gonna have to carry you out of here over my shoulder.”

It didn’t help.

He was too much in just the right way. And he still was, even as your mother was trying to shoo out the remaining guests. Him included.

“Mother, we were having a conversation.” You look at her pointedly but she just laughs and waves you off, wrapping her arm around yours. 

“You don’t need to be up so late my dear, you are still so young and fragile.” Schlatt can’t help but raise an eyebrow. He had heard you snort and already knew you were anything but. 

“If you wouldn’t mind, I would love to escort my lady to her rooms? It will be nice to say goodnight, even if I am going to see her tomorrow.” He gives a charismatic smile to your mother and she sighs, but nods her ascent. It doesn’t take long for your arm to be in his again.

“So we’re saying goodnight now?” You tease, “I wasn’t aware you were one to dodge promises, Schlatt.”

“Oh I am, but I will keep a promise just for you. I remember something about you falling asleep on my shoulder and I intend to get what I can out of that deal.” you both laugh as you walk down the almost silent halls. 

The sun was just starting to turn the black sky, a milky gray blue when you reach your door. Some part of you knew it wouldn’t be exactly correct to invite him in, but another louder part wanted to say fuck it and spend the early morning hours with him over drinks.

He ends up making the decision for you.

“Well, it was absolutely awful getting to know you little one, but I’m infatuated with your ass and sarcasm. I’ll be back to bother you, I promise” he winks and presses a soft kiss to your hand, reminiscent of the one he gave you when meeting. You try not to frown, managing a smile when he stands back up.

“I’m glad to know that’s all you think of me, and you are kind enough to keep rumors from spreading after tipsy decisions” he blinks and smirks

“So you were going to invite me in? Well in that cas-“

“No. You’ve given me an out and I’m taking it. My parents won’t let you stay if people start whispering about you being in my rooms at this hour. I’d much prefer you to stay.” He laughs again and you can’t help but smile.

“Okay, okay, I get it” he raises his hands “I won’t push, I’ll just punch the wall later and regret it when my knuckles are bleeding.” He takes a step back and smiles, giving you space to leave.

“Don’t beat yourself up too much. I still have plans for you.” You wink and start to slide into your room.

“See you tomorrow princess. Get some beauty sleep, you need it.” 

The door closes and you lean against it, catching your breath and smiling stupidly at nothing. He was too much and you loved it. Every second of it. 

That only made sleep harder to come by, and the sun was already mid sky when you feel yourself fall.

The sky was dark and the ground moves beneath your feet. Years of teaching and summer spent traveling help you realize you're on a boat. It’s not one meant for nobles to travel, that much is certain. A merchant ship. Nearly empty.

Your eyes move to the wheel, where a familiar face yells into the wind, men shuffle to follow orders and scramble to keep up. It’s easy to weave between them and make your way up to Schlatt’s side. 

He smiles at you and offers his hand, “I knew you’d like sailing little one, you’re my type a broad.”

The scene shifts to the two of you below deck reading over the stock lists and ports nearby. It’s a comfortable silence and you curl into his side. He presses a soft kiss to your temple and you feel warm.

Once more you shift, back in the ballroom, but it’s empty. Music swells and you find yourself in Schlatt’s arms, he mumbles soft words in your ear you can’t pick up, and you look to meet his eyes.

You wake up and it’s gone. He’s not holding you, so you wrap your arms around yourself and shake it off. 

“Stupid. He’s not important. You need to not fall so quickly, there is a better match for you.” Your grandmother's words from your own mouth. You didn’t believe them, but it was true. You shouldn’t fall so quickly. 

So then why was it so easy?


	3. Another one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Uh, I added Wilbur. Oops. I wanted drama and I am just planning as I go. There are some really good lines in this chapter though, so I’m pretty happy.

A brisk mid morning walk was supposed to get your mind off the problem at hand. Not that it would even be that much of a problem. Your parents would be happy to marry you off, and he was the option you saw the best future with. Too many past suitors trying too hard, or couldn’t make you laugh. You wanted a happy life, not just a comfortable one. 

The walk doesn’t even help. You’re brain buzzes with thought, so full you barely even acknowledge the other people you pass. It wasn’t unusual, but it was impolite. You end up giving up and leaning up against a tree to try and hide your stupid smile and ignore everything else

The way he pulled you close to dance, his smile, his humor, god what you would do to have that laugh playing on loop… he was far from perfect, but that’s what had you in so deep. 

It was so easy with him, easy in a way you weren’t allowed to have. Easy wasn’t allowed, it was rules and restrictions your whole life, a wall built up around you that you must scale for every ounce of joy you squeeze from your life, but him…

He tore down the wall, handed you joy like it was free, like he didn’t care what it cost him, like it was worth it just to see you smile. He made it so the rules didn’t matter, that people staring was inconsequential and that you shouldn’t have to live by their opinions. 

You weren’t allowed easy, but he made you want it so badly it burns in your throat. 

You lean against the tree with a stupid grin and let a soft giggle escape, hoping no one was near enough to listen. Even if you being impolite or distant was normal, you being so giddy was not and it would start the rumor mill. You aren’t that lucky when you hear a warm laugh from the path a few yards away.

Your eyes shoot open and you spot a tall man with a lopsided grin and a mess of curly hair. For a half second you think Schlatt, but he’s dressed too finely, and wire glasses rest on the tip of his nose.

“Well hello there, what has you so tickled?” It’s not a tease, but a genuine question and you can’t help but blush and look away.

“Nothing important, may I help you?” You straighten and put on the proper face of the heir to the house. Polite and friendly enough to pass for welcoming.

“Oh, yes. I’m looking for the lord of this estate? I’ve been told he wanted to talk with my father about some land contracts.” He tosses his head to the side so his hair no longer covers his eyes.

“That would be my father. I’ll take you to him, might I ask the name of our guest and his fathers title?” You would much prefer to go back to your fantasy under the tree, or even be walking with schlatt rather than lead some new noble around. This was going to be boring.

“Right, sorry about that. I’m the Earl Wilbur of L’manburg. My Father is Duke Philza, however I much prefer if you’d just call me Wil.” He smiles at you, but you are able to ignore it by walking ahead of him to lead the way to your own father.

“It’s a pleasure meeting you...Wil…” it’s weird on your tongue, to call someone by their name so quickly, but he had asked you to. You introduce yourself as you walk and he insists on calling you ‘darling’, and you roll your eyes as he does.

The walk is rather quick as you know your father is in the hall, most likely taking lunch while meeting with locals. 

Schlatt just so happens to be in the room as well, looking over a sheaf of papers off to the side. You lock eyes and he wink at you while you are still stuck next to Wil, talking about… court gossip? You don’t really know, as soon as you’d seen Schlatt your mind goes blank again.

Wilbur notices and coughs to get your attention, offering his arm as soon as you look to him. 

“Not much for polite conversation?” He teases, not looking your way as you take his arm and try to gain your fathers attention so you can go over to schlatt.

“Oh- no, I have no patience for it. I apologize,” he laughs and gently squeezes your arm, it’s...strange, but not the worst.

“No worries Darling, I won’t take up too much more of your time. But maybe next time we speak I’ll have to try harder to entertain. I’ll bring my guitar.” You cover your mouth to stifle a snicker, 

“You okay? I wouldn’t expect it, you seem more the sporting type.”

“Eh, that’s my brothers, I’m the creative type.” 

“Well then I’ll be sure to tell my father not to invite you hunting as a follow up. It’s his go to.” he laughs again and you see Schlatt look up from his spot at the wall and give you a strange look.

“I’m forever in your debt Darling,” he looks to see your father waving him up to speak, “and I suppose this is where we part. It has been a pleasure.” he bows and kisses the back of your hand, looking up to you through the mess of curls. “I hope to see you again soon,” his hand moves to caress your cheek but your father calling him again pulls his attention away and you take the chance to bolt.

You skitter over to Schlatt’s side. He wasn’t as jovial as last night, but he still smiles when he sees you. 

“There’s my gal, how was your night? No rumors about me ravishing you after walking you to your rooms?” you slap his arm, no real offense taken other than the bright blush high on your cheeks.

“None, thank you. It’s good to see you haven’t been run off yet. I hope my Father was reasonable when you spoke?” 

“More than reasonable, I might be around more often, he wants your port to be permanent on my trade route.” he says it nonchalant but you almost squeal in excitement at the thought.

“I’m so glad! That’s so good, for your business of course” you flush and cover your over excitement by clutching tight to the fabric of your outfit.

“Eh, I guess, the real reason I want to be round more often is this cute broad I met last night. The most obnoxious laugh I’ve ever heard.” He bumps your shoulder and you both laugh. 

Easy conversation flows again and you don’t even notice when he walks you out of the room. Back out to the gardens you walk side by side, your gaze stuck to his profile. It was like your walk this morning, only ten times better. You weren’t stressed when he was there, him making it easy to forget.

“So… not that I’m worried or anything, definitely not. But that guy, who was he? A bit too stuck up to be from around here.” he brings it up suddenly and you blush, but you don’t know why.

“He’s a Dukes son, sent out to talk business with my father.”

“Ah, a businessman. I knew a man that attractive wasn’t just another silver spoon asshole.” He waggles his eyebrows and you laugh, “so you have a type then? Hot business men who can make you laugh?” This question isn’t so joking, but he tries to play it off with a chuckle.

“I wouldn’t say that, why? You think I like you?” You try to brush of the topic by teasing him again. 

“Hey! You were the one about to invite me-“ you shove him and shush him in a panic as people pass you

“You can’t just- just say those things!” Your face is red and he grins, pulling you to a small alcove.

You’re both close again and your heart speeds up. He was looking down at you with those stupid eyes, and that stupid smile and-

“It’s alright little one, I promise I won’t ruin your rep yet.” He laughs quietly. “As long as you promise you won’t ruin mine.”

The words won’t come out but you nod, shaking softly from the thoughts running through your head.

“You alright princess?” His hand moves to cup your cheek, and the panic wells up further, “don’t start crying, I hate it when people cry” you manage a weak chuckle and close your eyes to take a few deep breaths 

“I’m f-fine, just a little shaken. You have an affect on me J…” the name leaves your mouth before you can stop them and he grins.

“I do have an affect on most people, but I’m glad I’ve been promoted from Schlatt. Do I get a pay raise too?” You both laughs again, no longer worried about being quiet.

“I was paying you before? I don’t quite remember…” he just rolls his eyes and runs his hand through your hair. 

“It’s fine, this is the only position I’d be glad to be in without pay.” 

Too easy. Too easy to talk, to laugh, to tease…  
Too easy to fall for.  
Oh no.


	4. The Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Umm, I added angst. My fiancé suggested good things, but I also had to through some plot twists for them

You had spent the next few days in much the same way, spending the early morning on a walk, getting found by Wilbur, walking him to find one of your parents, sometimes you spend a bit more time with him than necessary when he asks to see the library or your favorite garden, and then spending time with J. It was a pretty nice deal, you had a new friend to talk to that wasn’t stuck up, and J was always there to make you laugh or blush with his words. 

Of course this ideal schedule couldn’t last, and your parents decided having all of their current visiting business deals should all come out to the woods for a hunt.

Of course everyone was in attendance, women and children too, though only the trained ones received weapons or dogs to participate. You sat atop your favorite mare with a rifle slung over your shoulder. As the heir of the household you had to attend, and as Schlatt was participating you didn’t want to miss it.

He was still getting his horse ready when you trot up to his side. He had borrowed a horse from the stable, saying his was back home and the seas weren’t good for her. It made you laugh thinking about him trying to drag a horse aboard his ship.

“Good morning J, you looking forward to the hunt?” He looks up when he hears your voice and smiles.

“Course I am, I’ve been ready to have a weapon in my hands since I got here. Not that you aren’t just as dangerous, I’m just more experienced with a gun in my hand than you in my hand, broad.” You both laugh as he mounts his horse. You wouldn’t be able to stick too close together, the noise from one horse was enough. 

Let alone three…

Earl Wilbur and his steed gallop over, him waving excitedly. He was almost like a puppy, it was honestly fun to watch. 

“Darling! I thought you had taken off without me- er, the rest of us.” He smiles sheepishly and J rolls his eyes.

“Oh, I would have said hello if I’d known you were joining us. I thought you weren’t much for sport?” You tease, hoping to lighten the mood that had almost soured as soon as all three stood near each other. 

“Right, well-“

“He was probably hoping to talk to you again little one. He is working with your dad,” you didn’t expect J to pipe up and defend him, but it makes you smile

“T-that’s right! Thank you Schlatt.” Wil says but his eyes stay on you, “I was hoping you knew of a way to convince your father to visit lmanburg? It’s quite lovely this time of year and it’s worth getting to know the neighbors…” he rambled off a bit and you sneak a glance to J.

He rolls his eyes and mimes Wilbur where he can’t see and you have to bite your lip to keep from laughing. This makes him smirk and wink before turning back to pretend to pay attention. He was doing better than you at that. One would think he had experience pretending he cared about things like this.

Soon enough the three of you ride over to the larger group of people, ready to commence the event. You hadn’t been out on a ride in a while, and even if this was meant to be a hunt, you would enjoy it however you pleased. 

A gun shot fires and most of the group rides into the woods after their dogs, eager to get a good kill. Wilbur fumbles for a bit before taking off. Schlatt winks at you before trotting off in a different direction from most of the group. You just take off down your favorite trail, gun ready, but not too eager for anything.

The woods were dark, but comfortable, if you didn’t have so many responsibilities you would be out here much more often, wind in your hair and the dappled light on your skin.

A younger you, stumbling through the woods,  
Feet aching and face covered in scratched and mud.  
You felt alive.  
Nothing in the stuffy building would live up to this moment, the adrenaline pumping through you and the soft panting of your own breath kept you focused.  
You imagined a life for yourself on the run, no more rules.  
Little did you know then, your other half did much of the same as a young man.

You blink back into focus and spot a doe, grazing lazily a few yards away. She was beautiful. You raise your sights to her, aiming carefully so as to make it quick.

BANG

A shot rings out and she falls scrambling to the ground, still trying to run away as the blood flows. You jump off and run to her side, Wilbur appearing from the brush with an embarrassed look in his eye.

“You didn’t hit her right, she’s in pain.” You snap at him and try to comfort the panicked animal. 

“I- I’m sorry, I tried to tell your father I wasn’t good at this sort of thing-“

“Then you shouldn’t have stayed for it.” You shoot a glare up at him and stand up, now covered in blood. The deer was now fading quickly, thanks to your quick thinking and sharp knife. 

He can’t do much but open and close his mouth, looking like a fish as he tries to think of the proper words. You sigh and clamber back onto your mare, a heavy heart.

“You can carry her back. You need a decent prize.” Even though you were angry, you stay civil as you ride away. No use staying in the woods if you’re covered in blood. It was like inviting wolves to try and catch you.

———

Schlatt finds you later, sitting under a tree, eyes closed and trying to ignore the memory of watching the doe die like she had.

“Little one, I heard you left early. What’s up with that? Can’t even stay to watch me show off?” He smiles and tries to make you laugh, it doesn’t quite work.

“Hey J, I just- I wasn’t feeling like being wolf food tonight.”

“That big a mess huh? I saw that Earl guy with that bloody doe, his fuck up right?”

“Yes, but it's my fault for not telling my dad he seems to be a sucky sport guy.” J laughs and sits next to you.

“Not your fault, that’s on fuckface. But it’s okay, you did what you could.” You lean against him, he felt safe and sturdy, something stable compared to your thoughts at that moment.

“You always know just what to say, J. I’m impressed.”

“What can I say? They don’t call me advice man for nothin,” you laugh and close your eyes again. His hand comes to rest on your knee and it’s a nice moment. 

“Remember that promise I made? When we met?” He speaks up after a moment. You shake your head and yawn softly. “Well I do, take your nap sweetheart. I promised my shoulder would be a good pillow.” You laugh softly but accept it.

You stay like that for a long time, just on the brink of sleep, him talking lowly about his ship, and something about having to go back to it soon. 

The next thing you register is your fathers voice and arms around you, carrying you gently. He sounds…like he’s making a deal, so you fall asleep quickly again. 

Another moment you remember is a soft kiss to your temple and J passing you off to someone else.

Waking up you feel warm, and happily contented. The memory of his arms around you flush your face and you spot a note on the table next to your bed.

You walk over and it’s good that no one else is in the room with you as you slump to the ground. Tears fall to the parchment and you feel numb. 

This is why you are allowed to have easy things.  
This is why you shouldn’t have let yourself fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also! Thank you all for almost 500 hits and almost 50 kudos! It means so much!


	5. Another choice...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I promise the story won’t be all angst from here on, this chapter just really needed to be chock full so the next few can be full of revelation   
> Get your seats buckled, we’re going on a ride

It had taken a long time for you to stand and get ready for the day. The worst part was knowing that he wouldn’t be waiting for you.

He was gone.

The letter had been a goodbye, not even for now, just goodbye. Apparently he was needed urgently elsewhere, and without finishing the deal with your father who knows when he would be back. Certainly not by spring. 

It left a lump in your throat. That weightlessness of easy love- of easy happiness, it was gone. You felt like a sting sunk to the bottom of a lake. Lost and forgotten and ready to be worn away to sand.

Anyone would see how miserable you are as you walk around the estate. You avoid the garden, you see memories of him everywhere. The halls are echoey and cold, but at least they don’t bring sunshine when you wish for rain.

You spend the whole day like this. Not even your parents were able to drag you out of your funk, and neither could your friends drag you down to the streets for a bit of fun.

It felt worse, somehow, having met him. Having had him so close to being your freedom and then torn away leaving an even larger wound than before. Your head spins with memories of him, the way he smiled, the way he laughed, that horrible horrible man, why did it have to hurt so much. You knew it would happen, didn’t you? He was a merchant. He would have to leave at some point… but without a goodbye? That hurt more.

Wilbur had found you around sunset, slumped against the wall in a ball of shaking tears. When he reaches down to touch your shoulder you flinch away. 

The noise he makes is somewhere between shock and hurt. It forces your eyes up to see his soft and concerned smile.

“What has you so glum darling? I hope it is not still my accident yesterday.” you frown and shake your head, taking his hand as he offers to help you up.

“It’s not that. It’s just- a friend left without saying goodbye.”

“That doesn’t sound like much of a friend to me, I’m sorry love,” without your notice he has your arm linked with his and is leading you out to the dusky balcony.

“I suppose so… I just thought-“

“I try not to think about upsetting things myself. It only does harm, I think.” He offers a smile and you manage one in return. Somehow his smile filled a little bit of the void you felt. He was kind to you, even though you couldn’t be kind in return…

“That seems smart. You’re a smart man Wil.” He preens slightly at that and you chuckle. 

“I’m glad you think so, but I hope that’s not all you think of me.” He nudges your shoulder as you both look out to watch the sky grow dark. 

“I assure you, it’s not. I also think you are very kind, and maybe- just maybe, the slightest bit funny.” You grin out at the stars, your heartache forgotten for the moment.

You both fall quiet, a comfortable space, at least for you. Wilbur shifts back and forth after a long moment of silence. Almost like he feels the need to fill the space with movement if he can’t fill it with noise.

“Darling… I was wondering..” he speaks up, eyes on you again.

“I’m all ears, I owe you that at least, for dragging me from my slump.”

“I offered you father a visit to lmanburg… but he can’t leave your estate for the next few months.” The quiet isn’t as welcome now, the unspoken offer hangs in the air for you. You aren’t going to be the one to acknowledge it.

“That’s a shame, he loves to travel.”

“Yes- er, well, I was hoping you could come in his stead? I honestly would prefer for you to come anyway, we have more in common, and I’m sure my father would love y- love to meet you..” you have to cut him off before he rambles himself to death. 

Honestly? Maybe leaving would do you good… no more garden of memories, you wouldn't be able to wallow either…

“Yes. I’ll come.”

“And my broth- wait, really? I mean, that’s great! I can send word ahead and have everything set for you to come back with me,” his excitement is obvious, and it keeps the tears at bay. What harm could it really do to go with him?

The two of you walk back inside, backs to the pitch black sky, and conversation- well, Wilbur speaks enough for you both, and you are content to listen. It was…. not easy, but it was safe. Wilbur was safe.

——————

That’s what you tell yourself a few days later in the garden when he nervously asks to court you. His hands shake with yours held tightly in his. It would be endearing if you felt that way about him. 

You were still stuck on J.

You continue to tell yourself that Wilbur is safe when he very publicly, over dinner the next night, announces that he is courting you, and, with the permission of your parents, is taking you to his estate for the duration. 

The round of applause forces a smile onto your face, but you can’t help but leave quickly afterwards. Wilbur follows after, insisting he walk you to your rooms. 

He had been glued to you like you were some precious and fragile doll that he needed to protect. The way he held tight to your arm keeps the safe feeling secure in your chest, but it also makes you yearn for freedom more and more with each passing moment.

“Doe, are you excited to leave tomorrow? Lmanburg is already expecting us, and I don’t want to leave my father waiting…” you sigh softly, but nod. He had been insisting you leave early, saying stuff like this for days. You didn’t really care when you left, but you supposed sooner was better. For your mental well-being.

“Of course Wil. Now I’m off to bed and we can leave in the morning.” He smiles wide and bends down to kiss your cheek. 

“Sleep well my doe, I’m so glad to call you mine.”

You hated when he did that. But Wilbur was safe.

If you couldn’t have easy you could have safe, no matter how it caged and kept you. Safe may be dark and cold, but it also meant you wouldn’t be left again. Safe meant you would never feel as tho your wings had been clipped too sudden, as it would keep them clipped.

Safe love was all that was in store for you.

But what truly was safe anymore...


	6. Lmanburg Introduced

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exposition? Check  
> Angst? Check  
> Me making Tommy super sweet because I’m a Tommy apologist? 100%

The ride to lmanburg wasn’t awful, but you were beginning to hate wilburs habit of filling the silence. You couldn’t even close your eyes for half a moment before he started in on a new topic. 

At this moment, you wish you had stayed behind as he rambles on about how to properly string an instrument, or maybe it was finger placements? Whatever, it was boring and your head ached from lack of sleep.

He had you up and in the carriage at dawn, ready to get back to his home. You barely had time to tell your parents goodbye before he grabbed your hand to lead you away.

Of course, you shouldn’t mind, he was attempting to court you and he was just excited. You couldn’t blame him for being so giddy, it was exactly how you felt with J- no. No. You weren’t supposed to be thinking about him anymore.

Wil got touchy when you brought him up in conversation. He would suddenly withdraw and his clingy nature would disappear, leaving you worried and panicked at the thought of losing your security. Your new safety. 

So you had promised to stop. You had even promised to not dwell on thoughts of J for too long, Wilbur hated how mopey you could get. The promises were for your own good, as thinking on a past relationship while on track to engagement wasn’t the best first step.

You shake off the thoughts and smile adoringly at Wilbur. He had noticed your withdrawal from the conversation and had settled into watching you, his smile hidden behind the hand that propped up his chin.

“Are you alright my love?” he mumbles soft, your heart melting at how sweet he was being, even after you ignoring him.

“I’m fine Wil, just tired.”

“Do you have enough energy for one more conversation? I wanted to warn you about my family and all that,” you both chuckle, the tension melting away like snow. He was too perfect.

“I can try my hardest to listen. Wake me if I fall though.” he nods, and you settle in to listen to another long monologue.

“So I’m not the oldest in the family, that’s my older brother Techno, but there’s a debate as to who should get the title. We get along like two peas in a pod, but it can get kind of tense. Don’t worry, my darling doe, I’ll keep the situation in hand.” He smiles and grabs your hand to squeeze.

“Then my younger brother Tommy, he’s a rambunctious one, but he’s not a threat to anyone. Honestly, he’s my favorite. Other than you,”

“I’m sure I’ll get along with both of them if they are anything like you Wil.” he smiles, but it’s tense. Almost as if he’s worried about you getting along with his brothers…

“Of course, and my Father. Philza will be very kind to you I’m certain, but be careful. He has a habit of adopting anyone within range. He’s taken in all of Tommy’s friends anyhow.” this makes you smile.

You were sure to enjoy the time you spent here if those were the people around. Maybe it would be interesting enough to keep you distracted until you forgot. Or until you got engaged. Either one would work.

———————

It didn’t hurt, being away from home. Not as much as you had thought, but you suppose that has something to do with the lack of joy you had felt in those last few days. 

A part of you knew this wasn’t right, that it would waste what joy you had left but you ignore it. Every moment you spend here, you place another brick down to rebuild those walls that had been torn down so quickly. 

A trapped bird, but well loved and admired. Wilbur seemed to appreciate your laughter and joy, but he enjoyed just watching you in your solemn melancholy just as much. The way he looked at you made you feel like some fragile and perfect thing that he should want to hold close to his chest. There were still moments in which you struggled against him and he just held tighter but that was what you sacrificed to have his love.

Speaking of his tightening grip, his hand on your arm as you approach his estate is almost bruising. You try to comfort him with a hand over his, but he only calms for a moment before a sudden ball of energy barrels into view.

“WILBUR!” A voice calls and loud laughter gets closer. This would be Tommy, your guess is proven correct as Wilbur smiles and rolls his eyes before having to let go of you so the boy can wrap his arms tight around Wilbur. You chuckle softly and Tommy whips around to face you with an inquisitive look.

“Who’re you? You’re not from here at the very least, Wilbur, who are they? Why have you brought them home?” Another rambler, it would seem.

“I’m here as a guest, my father couldn’t make it, but it’s nice to meet you Tommy.” You give a grin to the kid and he watches you, rapt, as you incline your head towards him.

“Yes, and be nice.” Wilbur leans over to whisper into his brother's ear, “I’m trying to impress this one, I think they’re a keeper” Tommy gets a huge grin and immediately takes your arm.

“WELL THEN! It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’ll be your tour guide, I’m much more impressive than my brother. He’s super lame and a loser.” Wil sputters but you laugh as you get dragged around by the hyper young man.

“You do seem to fit that description, don’t tell your brother I said that.” You wink at Wil to tease and he just sighs and follows the two of you into the building.

Techno and Phil are standing side by side in a nearby hall when the three of you walk in. It’s not as...graceful as you would’ve hoped your introduction be, but it’s just about as you and you can get. 

You stumble over your own feet and almost pull Tommy with you, laughing the whole time, only to fall into Wil. He smiles down at you and presses a soft kiss to the hand he had caught. It makes you flush softly as you straighten up.

By the time you are set again, Tommy has already started climbing over Techno as the new duo walk over in your direction.

The formal introductions run a bit smoother until Wilbur wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you to his side in the middle of your conversation with Techno.

“It’s a really interesting idea- Wil!” You Yelp softly and try to pull his hand off your side but he just smiles tensely and holds you closer.

“You were so tired on the ride here my doe, we should get you settled, no?” The dark look in his eyes as he doesn’t even look at you sends a nervous shudder through you, but you dismiss it. He was caring in his own way.

“Right, sorry to cut this short, Wilbur has had to be on me about caring about myself.” Phil and Tommy say goodnight with warm smiles and welcoming auras, but techno just nods, something in his eyes makes you wary, but you don’t have time to consider it before Wilbur is saying again that you should be off.

———————

Wilbur doesn’t speak as he leads you around to your rooms. It’s strange after he seemed to be so concerned over you just moments before. The silence is heavy, but you don’t break it. Maybe you were scared of being the first one to speak for once.

He stops suddenly and turns to you with a sad expression, “I’m sorry my love, I’m just very tired, I feel like some time alone would do us both good.” You feel your smile waver, this was uncomfortable. 

“Wil, I’m not sure what happened but-“

“Just- it's not you my darling doe, I just don’t trust my family to not embarrass me if you meet them alone, so I want you to either be with me or alone for a while, okay?” You just nod, unable to form the words to question him. He presses a soft kiss to your cheek and leaves you to the new space.

The room isn’t bad, it’s just very obviously not a part of a home. It’s cold and void of life. No matter, it suited your mood.

You soon find yourself sprawled out on the bed, staring at the ceiling with nothing to distract you. Two warring thoughts jostle for attention. 

Of course one is the same pain of J leaving, and the seemingly never ending ache in your chest from that. The other is new and is frantic, panicked almost. The thought that you had done something wrong. Wilbur had left you alone now as well.

It wasn’t like his family were horrible people, so why did Wilbur seem so concerned about you speaking to them? Why would he choose to leave you when he knew how you got lately. When he had been so close to you to help you stop from feeling like this.

No matter. You shouldn’t even be asking yourself these things. Wilbur was yours and you were his. He cared in his own way and you- you would learn to soon enough. If not for his personality, for his saving you from yourself.

You owed Wilbur. You would repay him with learning to love him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually really fun to write and I might write more in this universe after I finish this work. Let me know what you guys want, if you want more
> 
> ALSO! I made a playlist if anyone is interested   
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1tNHTuYj6JdRk05IO97K5H?si=BmbXFwp-Sd2IE_dfQ98fmg


	7. Not So Safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I said buckle up, didn’t I? This might get heavier next chapter, but for now, there is a lot of manipulation, just a fair warning. This is not healthy, nor am I romanticizing it.

Your days in lmanburg seemed the same. Every morning you would wake up and wait for Wilbur to come get you, usually taking the time to watch the clouds from the small window. Then you and him would walk, and he would talk and you would listen. 

The brick walls were back but you didn’t even attempt to climb them anymore. The way Wilbur cared for you made it so easy to just sit against your cage, ignore your wings aching from disuse and wait for him to give you happiness.

He liked the way you now clinged to him. Spending most of your time within your room made finding your way around quite hard, so you depended on him. And then there was the business of you not being- you weren’t supposed to spend time around his family alone. 

So you cling. You listen and smile and wait and obey. When he asks you to dress a certain way you did, when he says you’re his, you agree. You love to see him happy, the way his eyes light up when you spend all your time with him, it was a spark in your now dim life.

At this exact moment you were once again waiting for Wilbur to collect you for your morning together. Even as your stomach grumbles and the time ticks on you wait, eyes glued to the bright blue sky, a few stray pieces of hair catch the wind and it’s the most peace you have felt in so long. You ache to sink into it and just spend your day in the moment.

The door opens and you are forced from your peace. 

Wilbur grins from the door and offers his hand, not a word spoken and you quickly rush to his side. He chuckles and kisses your hair.

“Good morning my doe, eager for this morning are we?” He teases, and it falls flat but you still laugh and nod.

“Of course I was, you make me eager for every morning.” he preens at your words and rewards you with a gentle squeeze to your hand, the comfort kind and genuine.

“How sweet, I have a surprise for you this morning too. It’s a family breakfast, Father wants to get to know you better.” You light up and smile, you had barely spoken to anyone other than Wilbur since arriving and it pleased you more than anything to hear.

“Oh thank you! That’s so sweet of you, I want to know your family better as well. They seem like such nice people, and I’ve yet to express how thankful-“ he cuts you off,

“It’s nothing love, I just thought I’d spoil you a bit, you’ve been so good lately. No more of that moping around,” you smile tensely at that, you had been still thinking of J in your alone time, but Wil did not need to know that.

You spend the walk trying to keep your excitement tamped down and nodding along with Wilbur. He was so- he just spoke so much and never seemed to give you a word in edgewise. It could be tiring sometimes…

Phil, Techno, and Tommy were all sat down and Tommy was talking animatedly about something as you both approach.

“-AND THEN WE ALMOST FELL AN- oh! Wilbur! You brought them for breakfast!” Tommy grins at you and scoots over to offer you the seat next to him. The kid was so sweet and just wanted more people to talk to. As you move to take the seat Wilbur pulls you close and nods to the seat across the table, next to his. 

You smile and shrug to the young kid as you follow Wilburs silent request. Tommy just pouts but you can’t pay attention for very long as Wil grabs your hand on the table and pulls your attention.

Techno grunts softly just as you start to relax again and you stiffen. All Wilbur had told you about Techno was a bit intimidating, but surely Wilbur wouldn’t put you in danger.

“It’s good he finally let you join us,” Techno finally speaks up, “we still haven’t finished our conversation about war tactics by sea,” a soft smile plays at your lips and you are about to respond when Wil speaks up.

“They’ve been only wanting to spend time with me, it’s why we haven’t joined. I mean, I can hardly blame them, you lot are a lot to take in for someone unaccustomed to it.” It’s a joke, or an attempt at one. You’re too hung up on the first bit to laugh along with Tommy and Phil…

Had you given that impression? Not wanting to spend time with his family? Why would he say that unless it was true… ugh, it made your head hurt to think about and the smile on your lips falters. Hopefully no one notices it, Wilbur wouldn’t let you hear the end of it. 

You focus back in on Phil laughing with his boys about something, all three joining in this time. It calms you for a second and you chuckle softly, a hand ready to stifle a snort.

“Anyway, dear, I hope Wilbur is treating you right. Of course I raised my sons to treat their partners well, but I worry sometimes. Especially having not seen too much of you.” Duke Phil smiles at you, the worry evident in his eyes. His words felt genuine and warm, it was nice.

“Of course he has, he takes such good care of me. Honestly he takes better care of me than I d-“ you get cut off by a sudden squeeze of you hand.

“Of course I treat you well my doe, you’re mine after all.” he hadn’t done this in front of other people yet and you hesitate to agree with him, face going red at everyone’s eyes on you.

Wilbur frowns and squeezes harder, making you Yelp softly, prompting a frown from Phil and techno. 

“I’m sorry.. I must not be feeling well…” you mumble, trying for some excuse to get the attention gone. 

“We should get you back to your rooms then.” He sounded cold again, you knew he was upset.

“But- but I wanted to talk more!” Tommy whines but stops with a look from Techno.

“Of course, don’t worry, I hope you feel better dear.” Phil looks even more worried than he had been but doesn’t try to stop you leaving.

You didn’t want to leave, but Wilbur drags you away from the table, and you realize you hadn’t even eaten anything. 

This wasn’t a good day…

———————

It was hours later and you were just now blinking back into focus. Wilbur had berated you for not answering him and even for embarrassing him. It hadn’t lasted long before he had left you, all alone to wallow in hurt. Your hand had even started to bruise.

The sudden knock at your door has you up on your feet and pasting a smile to your face.

“Wilbur, I’m so glad you’re- oh! Hello Tommy, Techno.” Your smile becomes less forced and you relax in the doorway, “what brings you here?”

“I wanted to go on an adventure and I wanted to bring you with! It’s so boring here and it's so much more fun in the woods with Tubbo. Techno is coming along so I don’t end up dying.” Tommy immediately bombards you with information and you chuckle.

“I’d love to come, but Wil-“

“Is in a meeting with Phil right now. So no worries for a few hours.” Techno speaks up, “the kid won’t let this go until you say yes, so make this quick.” You just nod and let the two lead you out of the estate.

Tommy does most of the talking, letting you relax and enjoy the sunlight. A part of you wants to follow Tommy’s lead and run off into the woods, but another tells you to stay back. It would be better if you just stayed composed.

It’s a lovely afternoon, you make a few jokes and both boys laugh, making your heart soar. The way it felt easy again as soon as you weren’t trapped, goodness it was freeing.

Tommy ends up running off to find his friend out in the woods, but you stay back with Techno, one boy was enough for you to deal with.

The silence lasts for a while, the comfortable sort you wouldn’t have expected after all you’d heard, after all you’d been told to think of Techno.

He was not the brute nor the angry man. He was at that moment, a tired older brother who couldn’t help but smile at the antics. It made you ache for the man you saw as so very similar. The way they both covered their soft sides with some shell of toughness, it was so sweet…

“You do know he wants to marry you right?” Techno breaks the silence.

“Wh- of course, he is courting me.”

“No- well. I mean do you know why he wants to marry you.” It’s a strange question, and it strikes a cord of fear in you.

“I assume because he cares for me… he does so much to prove that,” the words are shaky at best and you sigh, “am I wrong?”

“I hope not.” Techno looks up at the sky for a moment, trying to gather his words, “you might be though. There’s a certain… loophole? In the succession line for Phil’s title.”

“What- why are you telling me this?”

“If Wilbur marries someone before-“ he’s cut off by Wilbur approaching quickly from the woods. You scramble up to smile at him and maybe get an apology for earlier in when he suddenly grabs your wrist.

“WHY, are you here, with them, and not where I left you?” His words are not in the slightest bit kind or worried, the rage in his eyes apparent even to Techno, now a few feet away.

“I- um- I was just-“

“I don’t want to hear it. Just- why can’t you be good and listen to me for once!” He snaps and you turn pink, embarrassed by how he was treating you and angry at him for keeping you locked away.

“Wil-“

“I SAID I DONT-“

“JUST BE QUIET FOR ONE MINUTE SO I CAN EXPLAIN!” You snap and immediately regret it. He shakes with barely concealed rage as Tommy walks back up.

You messed up, he hated you, he would leave you again, this time without anyone to find you, and you wouldn’t have your safety again, even less so have your easy… 

Oh no oh no, ohno ohno ohno-


	8. A Deal is Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry about the ending of this chapter.
> 
> TW- Manipulation, Gaslighting, Lack of Consent

It was a mistake to lash out at Wilbur. Techno doesn’t even make a move to help you, instead grabbing Tommy and pulling him away. You barely even hear Tommy whining over the blood rushing in your ears.

Wilbur’s grasp on your wrist only grows tighter as he waits for Techno and Tommy to leave.

“I’m sorry-“ you cut of with a yelp and your gaze falls to the ground,

“You aren’t. You did this on purpose to upset me didn’t you.” He accuses and grabs your chin when you don’t immediately look up.

“I didnt, I swear I never meant to-“

“JUST- why are you being like this today? You’ve been so good! You’ve done everything I asked up to now..” his eyes flick over your face 

“I’m not trying to disobey, I just wanted to see more than the inside of my room..” the hand holding your chin softens and a thumb gently caresses your cheek

“Then you should have asked me. Not my brothers. It hurt to see you sneaking around with them- do you like Techno more than me?” He suddenly accuses and your heart aches at his sudden sadness.

“I would have but you seemed so mad about this morning,”

“I wasn’t mad, well, I was, but now I’m just disappointed.” He lets the silence sit and tears start forming in your eyes

“I was nervous in front of your family, you know I don’t like being told what to do in front of other people-“

“I KNOW!” He snaps and takes a breath, “I know doe, I was just hoping you would have for me. You know how much I like to hear you say you’re mine..” he keeps pulling the attention to him and it strikes that same cord of fear in you that Techno had during your conversation earlier.

It was so confusing, this whole conversation had your head spinning back and forth, the way his anger faded to sadness and then whipped back around with sudden rage. It was awful and it made it impossible to make him happy. Keep him in the good mood you had originally liked him for. 

“I’m sorry Wil… I’m still yours, I promise.” You smile softly at him, eyes damp. You knew that you didn’t fully believe that anymore, but he didn’t need to know that. “I’m yours..”

“Mine.” His voice is low as he gathers you up into his arms. His grip was still too tight around you and you could feel his smile against your scalp.

The sky has started growing dark after having stood there, trapped, for so long. You take notice first but don’t bring it up. The idea of making him mad again after taking so long to calm down had you feeling sick. 

Wilbur eventually notices and suddenly you are completely in his arms, up in the air. You shriek softly but Wilbur only laughs as you clutch tightly to him. 

“I’ve got you darling. You’re safe.” He teases you softly and you let it happen as he carries you back to the estate. You don’t even have to look where he’s going to know you are headed straight back to your rooms. You weren’t sure if you wanted him to stay or leave you alone again.

It doesn’t really matter as he ends up leaving you with a soft kiss to your now thoroughly bruised wrist and an apology for how terribly the day had gone.

It’s not enough to quell the fear and doubt that had piled up in your mind. It wasn’t enough to make it worth the bruising and shaking in terror.

You wanted to go home.

———————

You manage to suffer through the next morning being doted on by Wilbur. He showered you with affection and begged to see you smile for him. His hands were soft once again and he was gentle when tending to your wrist.

“Oh my darling, I’ll never forgive myself”

“I’ll never do this again, I swear it.”

“Please smile for me, my doe? It would make me so happy.”

“You are the light of my life.”

It made you feel sicker. You hadn’t even fully explained yourself and you knew he still blamed you. The way he spoke about the event as if only you could have stopped him from hurting you. If only you had done what he asked.

Instead of telling him how you actually felt about his sudden change you just smile and laugh along. Even when Tommy stops by with Techno you just wave off their confusion by clinging tighter to Wil. You want nothing more than to escape with them again but it’s not possible. Wilbur hasn’t even left you alone for a moment since this morning. 

Eventually he settles enough and is quiet long enough for you to come up with some sort of a plan. It’s not a permanent solution but you would at least have space for a while.

“Wil… I wanted to apologize for my behavior yesterday. All of it really.” He perks up and you can’t help but notice the excited grin on his face, “I was overwhelmed at breakfast and I regret my actions, and that evening…”

You pause, looking up to see him staring not so patiently at you to continue.

“I was so upset after you left me, that when they offered to take me outside I couldn’t say no. I missed- I guess I’m just a bit homesick Wil…” he grabs your hand and you fake a sniffle.

“Oh my poor doe…” his free hand caresses your cheek, “what can I do to make that go away, hmm?”

This was it. This was your one chance to get him to let you go. If only for a short while you would still be free. Take a step away before you decide to settle into his caged love forever.

“Can I, maybe, go home for a bit? Just me, so I can see my parents?” He goes tense as soon as you ask and takes a sudden deep breath, “not for very long of course,”

It’s quiet for a long time while you wait for his answer. It’s stressful and you want to beg for a response, something other than this awful empty silence and dead stare.

“Ok.”

“Really? Oh Wilbur thank you, I can’t express how grateful I am-“

“On one condition.” His eyes are cold and calculating. You nod, shocked into silence by his agreement and then request. Honestly you would probably agree to whatever you asked, anything to get out. 

“We make the engagement official upon your return. I’ll organize the event, get you a ring, whatever. I already have your fathers permission and I want to marry you.” Your eyes go wide. He’d planned this, it’s apparent with how quick he is with the details.

You can’t help but let your chin drop and your eyes rest on your hands. The combating thoughts in your head once again overwhelm. It was a debate between your temporary freedom and your freedom to choose to stay. He wanted to take away your chance to run, and you could see straight through to that. 

“...okay. As soon as I get back, I promise.” You manage to smile up at him despite the tears now trickling down your cheeks. 

You are soon gathered up in his arms and held tight to his chest as he almost dances in excitement. 

“Oh my darling, my love, light of my life and soon to be wife, I love you. You don’t underwhat this means to me.” You can do nothing but move with him and hold back the tears. There is no way you could pass them off as joy if you were to open your mouth. 

He pulls away for a moment and scans over your smiling face. It doesn’t take long to read what he had in mind and even less time to realize he was already leaning in.

It was stiff and tense, this kiss. It had no feeling other than possessive claiming behind it. You can’t pull away with his arms still around you so you suffer through and try to focus on breathing when he pulls away.

“You’re mine, Doe. All mine” are the words he whispers into your ear.

You’ve got your escape, but the cost. Oh goodness, this cost may be too high.


	9. Back Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did someone ask where the schlatt content was in this schlatt fic? Well I have some, not a lot but here ya go.

You had set out the following day, ready to be home as soon as possible. Especially since Wilbur had somehow gotten more touchy since your agreement. 

The two of you had gone to dinner that evening with his arm around your waist and whenever he could manage, his face buried in your neck or hair. Tommy had made faces and Techno looked concerned, but Phil just shrugged it off as puppy love. It hurts to see a man that you trusted not see through to your discomfort.

You were out now though. The carriage was already pulling up to your home. The travel is so much quicker this time, being able to sleep through it, rather than be rambled at for hours.

The sky is bright as you step out. Your parents greet you with warm hugs and questions about your stay, about politics, and about Wilbur. You manage to beg off and escape.

The garden hasn’t changed much since you left. You half expected everything to be different, to feel sad seeing how everything had changed but instead you find yourself bitter that it didn’t. That you were forced to change so very much and the world stood still and let it happen.

You find tears threatening to spill over without warning and you can do nothing but let it happen. There is no one there to cling to, or wipe them away, and you feel grateful. You are allowed to feel and weep and ache without hiding and it’s amazing.

You can mourn without judgement. You let yourself sob without being shushed. You let yourself feel. Feel deeply and truly. 

It doesn’t take long for you to find your favorite tree, standing beneath it with a sad smile.

“I miss you J… I wish you were here..” you mumble softly to nobody and hug yourself, moving on to the small alcove you had hidden in.

Your hand moves to run over badly carved letters that J had done one evening while joking with you.

‘I’m yours little one’ 

You have to pull away like it burns before you can melt into the soft phrase. Before you decide to curl up next to it and let yourself wash away.

This isn’t what you wanted. You didn’t want to be visiting these old memories, you wanted to be making new ones. You didn’t want to return back with a wedding ahead, you wanted to go on a voyage with no return date.

But you can’t. This dream isn’t possible, he left you to Wilbur, you made a deal, there is no other choice.

——————

The warmth you remember from your bedroom is gone, and only the dark shadows flickering on the walls remind you that there was once your life here.

You can’t help but pick up the letter that had started your descent to this point. Your fingers gently trace the words smeared from tears, and you hold it tight to your chest.

Breathing deep and resigning yourself to a tireless night you move to the side of your bed.

You are just about to settle down when creamy white paper catches your eye. A single sheet of folded paper sits on your pillow, and your heart leaps at the thought of what it could be. 

“Little one,

I know this doesn’t make up for leaving like I did, but I’m sorry. And I’m sorry I missed you, no clue when you’ll be back. Seems I was too much of a coward to woo you while I had the chance. 

Too much of a coward to stay. 

I’m scared of you, of how much hold you have over me. In no other case would I have ever left in the conditions I did, but I was threatened. Threatened with losing you forever. Guess I fucked that up too. I’ve lost you anyway.

Don’t take this the wrong way, I hope you’re happy with Earl what’s-his-face, but I wish it was me. I will always wish it was me.

You might hear some awful things about me, and I wish I could tell you they were lies, but most of them are true. Please don’t hate me little one.

Forever yours,  
J

P.s. I’ll be back in case you respond, I just need the closure…”

You can’t help the smile that crosses your face at any words from J at all. From the fact he was coming back. It was the best you had felt in ages.

You also can’t forget that he mentioned he was threatened. It was most definitely the reason he had left so suddenly and you wanted to burn with rage at the idea of someone doing that to your chance at happiness.

The letter is enough to have you hop out of bed and start penning a new letter immediately. If you left before he came back? He needed to know you still cared, that you regretted every moment not with him and you could never hate him.

“J,

I’m so glad to hear from you, I can’t imagine how I would have faded so much quicker without your contact. 

Wilbur has proposed now, and on my return to L’manburg we make it official. Oh how I wish it was you instead, you would not cause me such distress.

He is such a volatile man, one moment kind and the next I am bruised from the force of his rage. 

I could never find it in my heart to hate you, I carry too much affection for you in the place where hate would live. I wish you well if I don’t see you on my trip, and I hope this brings you some closure, if not at least the knowledge that I’m still yours in heart if not in body.

Your little one,”

It is an easy letter to write and an even easier one to seal and leave with a pressed flower on your desk. Hopefully he would see it upon his next visit if you weren’t able to give it to him in person.

No longer do you fear sleep this night, instead you settle into the warmth in your chest and fall into a sweet sleep. You feel more than you have in days and you can’t stop the smile that overcomes you in your sleep.

——————

Unknown to you, Wilbur is already setting up wedding arrangements knowing you will agree to marry by spring. He cannot help but wait anxiously for your return and the return of his promised future.

Techno sits idly by as his brother does these things, and catches wind of a beat up vessel approaching your own estate at rapid speeds. He knows not who it holds, only that it is well known in L’manburg as a criminal’s ship.

Schlatt sits aboard his ship with an unbearable ache in his chest at the idea of somehow losing you again. He can’t keep still and can’t keep his mind off thoughts of you and Wilbur. How he wishes it were him.

It is a new day, and this new day brings with it, it’s own conflicts and joys.

You can only hope that you find more joy than pain upon your return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *google: how to stop crying at all the nice comments*
> 
> Seriously you guys are amazing! So many kind comments! Over 1100 hits, over 100 kudos, I’m so lucky


	10. The Engagement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m handing out free seatbelts now, cause this ones a doozy, hopefully in a good way. This is getting way longer than I originally planned and I love it.

Your trip didn’t last long. Word had gotten to your parents about the event planned for your return and even they became anxious to get you back to L’manburg. It didn’t matter when you begged an extra day or two, they were too excited to see you engaged and happy.

You dragged your feet in leaving still, stopping upwards of five times the morning of your departure just to spend time in the gardens or staring at the docks. 

He didn’t arrive in time for you to hand over your letter. Settling into your carriage to make the trip back is when the thought finally sinks in. You sniffle and wipe at your eyes as the cart starts rolling. You wave to your parents who would be a few days behind, needing to take care of some simple things first.

You are too far to turn around when you spot a boat on the horizon. You can’t help the sob that escapes when you think it could possibly be J. It’s awful, how terrified you feel about your return, but you have to collect yourself before you arrive.

Wilbur would most definitely not be pleased to see you in such a state about returning to him.

You didn’t want to suffer the consequences.

——————

You were correct about him not being happy about your tear stained face, but you are able to cover it by saying it was only tears of joy. Tears of elation at being officially his.

He immediately releases any foul mood at that point and almost carries you to the front hall. His euphoria only lasts until his family comes to greet you as well.

Tommy hits you with a hug that almost knocks you over. You both laugh and you let go of your fear for a moment.

“I thought you’d never come back! Honestly thought I’d run you off since I hadn’t seen you since our adventure” you assure him it wasn’t that with a warm smile. Phil is the next to greet you, a less intense hug, but just as sweet.

“Wilbur told me, I’m so excited to have another addition to our little family.” You melt at his kind words. Even your own father hadn’t been so warm at your arrival home, Phil was such a good man. 

Techno stands back for the first two greetings, as Wilbur had his eyes locked on him. It’s definitely not a hug in welcome, but he takes your hand and squeezes it gently, an act of comforting.

“I’m glad to see you safe, I’ll be rather busy and I apologize, but do not hesitate if you find yourself in need of help.” His offer of help is of course an offer of protection in thin disguise. You want to respond with a genuine thank you but Wilbur has to cut you off. 

“My darling will only need to look to me for help, I’m sure.” It’s full of venom, but he quickly follows it up, “but thank you brother. I’m sure they appreciate it.”

You were back without your own words, the cage seems to have shrunk since you left, no chance for you to be encouraged or have thoughts of leaving. 

Not that you would. You had made a deal, and the only person you would break the deal for had not arrived in time. By the moment the ring was on your finger he would not be there to stop it, no one would. 

Your only option is to grin and bear it, learn to be comfortable inside your confinement. It was quite a nice prison if you thought about it. And you would let yourself think about it as you stood hanging off Wilbur’s arm. It would be kinder than letting yourself think about an easier life.

—————

A tightly clutched letter in one hand and the other on the wheel of a ship as shouts are heard over rough wind. Wicked cackling from a crew and the slapping of waves against the hull.

—————

The night of the ball has arrived far too quickly. Wilbur planned everything down to the last detail. Your outfit had been hung up and ready for you to wear from the moment you arrived. He was so desperate for you to be official. It was…. it was sweet. That’s all. 

You weren’t to think bad of him. At the end of it all, you’d be his, but you’d have his family as well. You would have laughter when he allowed it, and you could find ways to live a good life.

Right at this moment you were staring out the small window in your room, wishing for a glass of champagne and to feel trapped like you had before you’d met J. That trapped was freedom compared to this.

The door opens and Wilbur walks in with a wreath of flowers for your hair. 

“I have a gift for my precious Doe~” he sing songs his way in and you laugh softly, turning to him with a tired smile.

“Oh how you spoil me Wil, what can I do to repay you.” he secures the wreath in your hair and tucks a stray hair back. 

“Just kiss me when the announcement happens. On the cheek of course, nothing too improper. I need you to look overjoyed.”

“Easy then, I will be ecstatic when your ring is on my finger.” The words spill out without your thought, it was so much simpler to play into his whims than to fight, wasn’t it.

He offers his arm and you take it, both ready and dreading the event ahead of you. You should at least enjoy the dancing.

—————

Yas speaking of dancing, that is almost all you do that night. Being spun around by different guests is the most fun you can have. Most of them are very funny, and even congratulate you on the engagement. Someone in the rumor mill must have been told about the event's purpose then.

You have a few favorite dances that night though.

Surprisingly, dancing with Wilbur is amazing. It is the gentlest he has ever been, and the way he stares at you like you are the only person in the room is enough to make you melt.

You manage a quick dance with Phil and he makes you smile the hardest that night. He offers to get you a room closer to Wilbur and take you out for a ride sometime. It was easy to forget how long it had been since you had.

Dancing with Tommy is the most fun, he makes you laugh and has you stand on his feet so he can control the dance better. The dance ends with you both cackling and leaning against the wall. 

Techno is your current partner. He is stiff and his head is on a swivel, eyes on the lookout for something, but he wouldn’t tell you. Didn’t want to worry you. You let yourself enjoy the music as he leads you around the dance floor.

It’s a surprise when you realize you are on the edge of the floor, almost out onto a balcony. You look up to techno confused, but he’s smiling. And he’s not looking at you. 

A hand replaces techno’s on your waist and a warm voice starts up, causing you to jolt. You must be dreaming, it’s not, it couldn’t be…

“Hello little one.” J speaks softly into your ear and Techno nods to you both, letting you go. Schlatt quickly takes his place and waltzes you around the balcony to the now distant music.

“You didn’t think I’d let you say you loved me and then not come get you, did you?” His smirk is the best thing you’ve seen in your life, you think.

Tears slip from your eyes at a rapid pace. It wasn’t a dream. He was here to save you just like he had at your last ball. 

“J…”


	11. It’s not over yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I said schlatt content and I supplied.  
> He’s back, so have fun with that while it lasts.
> 
> It’s not over yet.

“J…” you can barely get the word out, you’re so shocked. He’s here and his arms are around you and…

Wilbur is still inside waiting for you.

“So, I have a proposition…” he’s speaking quickly, and even though he’s still dancing with you he seems on edge.

“J, I can’t- how are you even here?”

“Shh, just, just let me ask first before we get into the nitty gritty,” you have to nod. He opens his mouth to continue when Techno pops his head out onto the balcony.

“We’re on a tight schedule, Wilbur is getting antsy already.” Schlatt nods and gently grabs your shoulders,

“Okay, I want you to come with me. Get you out of L’manburg.” It’s sudden and you splutter with confusion.

“Wait, what? You can do that? But what about Wil-“

“He doesn’t matter. Your friend over there filled me in on what you didn’t in your letter. He’s dangerous, more than leaving with me is. And god, you look awful from dealing with his shit.” His hand moves to your cheek, “please,”

“One question. What are the rumors you said I might hear?” It had been bugging you and now that he was here you couldn’t stop yourself from asking. He smiles.

“Of course you would ask that. I’m kind of known as a wanted man? I sold some shady people some stuff I didn’t have, and left before they figured it out.” He seems proud of it, even if it was something he was nervous to share.

“Well… that wasn’t what I expected.”

You both take a moment to think. If you just disappeared he wouldn’t get anything out of it really, and they would pin it on your family…

Knowing Wilbur it would be awful.

“Take me with you. Just let me tell them I’m leaving. That way no one else gets hurt.” His grin only grows at that. He almost leans in, but ends up just kissing your forehead.

“Anything for you doll. I’m just glad I get to take you with me.” You both smile and forget to worry about time. No longer are you thinking about your parents and Wilbur in the next room.

You can already feel him tearing away at the walls that had taken so long to build back up. It was amazing and seeing him made you feel like you were breathing new clean air. 

Even the gnawing thoughts at the back of your mind can’t fight the pure joy of having your easy back. Of having real safe love, no more worry of sudden rage. And this time he wouldn’t leave, because you were leaving with him.

Techno breaks your reverie by poking his head back in.

“Hey Romeo, speed it up. I may be giving you a pass to get them out of here, but I don’t want a criminal in my house for longer than necessary.”

You both laugh and J nods, wrapping an arm around you.

“We’ll be off as soon as this broad can leave a note letting someone know they ran. Too kind for their own good-“

A sudden loud noise echoes from the hall. It’s all too quickly silent and even techno looks a bit worried at that.

“Hello! It’s a pleasure to have you all here.” Wilbur’s voice is the only noise from the room and your heart drops. He was doing it now.

“I have a very special announcement for you all, but to do that I need a very special person…” J and techno both turn to look at you as he speaks and you’re frozen in place. You were running out of time to leave your note.

“My darling doe, where are you?” A murmur starts up in the crowd and your first instinct is to go to him, the weeks of doing exactly that kicking in but J grabs your arm and you stop.

“Love? I know you’re here” Wilbur’s laugh is tense and you have to turn away to keep from panicking.

“You two should go, I don’t know how long I can-“

“Someone find them.” His voice is dark and even if you can’t see him you know the look in his eyes. It burns to think about. If he was near you you would already have bruises forming. 

The people within the room start shuffling and getting closer. Techno disappears from the balcony and J turns to you.

“Don’t worry, it’s gonna be fine. I’ll get you out of here no matter what.” He tries to console you.

It would have worked. You would have smiled and laughed, trusting him more than anything. But it doesn’t, because someone tears open the curtains hiding the door to where you were hidden. 

It doesn’t work because as soon as he says that your eyes meet Wilburs and you can’t stifle the whimper that escapes. He is seething behind his smile. The hand that stretches out towards you is shaking so much you can see it from where you are.

His hidden rage doesn’t last long. It’s outward as soon as he sees Schlatt with his arms on you. As soon as he sees Techno trying to push the curtain back into place. 

“SCHLATT!” His voice booms and you are shoved behind J as he quickly turns to face the crowd with his normal confident smile.

“Wilbur! A pleasure to see you again,” it’s all bravado, but you are the only one to realize. He’s squeezing tight to your hands to keep from shaking.

“Get away from my fiancé.” J only laughs and shakes his head,

“No can do bud. See, we are in the middle of a conversation right at this moment.” The sass falters as Wilbur starts towards the pair.

J leans back to you and meets your eyes,

“You’re gonna have to trust me little one, okay?” You barely manage a nod before you are swung around to the front of Schlatt with the dull side of a blade to your throat.

Wilbur stops in his tracks and even Techno freezes to glare at schlatt. This apparently wasn’t part of the deal and it set everyone one edge.

“Let go of them.” Wilbur demands, hands shaking at his sides.

“Hmm, I don’t think I’d live very long if I did that, so no.” He smiles cockily over your shoulder and backs the two of you up to the edge of the balcony.

“Schlatt, you are already a wanted criminal. Don’t make it worse by stealing my fiancé.” J just laughs, the sound makes your heart jump but the knife at your throat makes it hard to do anything about it.

“Hardly a threat big man.” He looks over his shoulder for a split second. “Jump.” 

You both fall off the balcony. It feels endless, and you can feel schlatt wrapping himself around you. You can barely hear the chaos above you as the wind rushes past but a split second before you land you see Wilbur at the edge of the balcony. You smile. You’re free.

You land with a thunk and schlatt wheezes beneath you. 

“You assholes, that was not enough cushion. I should shoot one of you idiots.” J hisses at two shadowy figures. They both double over with laughter

“Well we were expecting a bit more time boss.”

“Not enough warning man,” neither stops laughing until Schlatt stands and moves to help you.

“We should run now, little one. Ditch these fuckers.” You laugh at his offer and kiss his cheek.

“Lead the way J. I’ll follow.” The other two fake gag and roll their eyes, but stand up, ready to follow Schlatt as well.

All four of you take off into the night air. No one jumped down behind you so you have a few minutes lead to do so.

It’s amazing with the wind in your hair and the dirt beneath your feet. It was the start of something, that’s for sure. 

And it was you and J. Not Wilbur. No more cages. No more rules. It was exactly what you’d always wanted. Perfection.

—————

The room you had left behind was in chaos.

Wilbur had thrown a punch at Techno as soon as he had backed away from the edge.

“YOU LET THEM GET AWAY YOU BASTARD! MY FUTURE, MY RIGHT, MY DOE” 

The fight is ugly and brutal but very quick. Wilbur is pulled away screaming and frothing at the mouth. Techno however is calm with a subtle grin on his face. He’d done the right thing in his mind. No matter who disagrees he wouldn’t suffer mental anguish from this.

Your parents were quickly escorted to their rooms.

Phil had to watch everything unfold and the events told so many different stories from the outside, but currently he had to stop his youngest from following the jumpers. He had much to think about and wasn’t going to do it in this chaos.

It wasn’t over yet.


	12. It’s Easy Once More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have some fluff for a bit. Don’t get too comfortable, I’m an angst writer.

The ship was practically falling apart, covered in salt and barnacles, rotten wood covered in broken boards to try and keep the vessel together. It was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.

All four of you scramble aboard. The other three immediately move to get ready to leave, while you just watch in awe. You had never seen a crew work like the three of them, and it was amazing to watch them yell at one another and argue but work better than any machine you’d ever encountered.

You wind up looking out to the horizon, watching the Sky start to turn pink with the dawn. It was beautiful and you find yourself lost in it as the boat bobs along with the waves.

You subconsciously rub at the fading bruises and smile at the tender pain. It was no longer your fate to suffer that. You no longer had to bite your tongue, as evident by how blunt and brash everyone around you was. Taking a deep breath, you close your eyes. 

Somewhere in the back of your head you hear an echo of ‘free, easy, it’s yours, you can have this, you deserve this’ and it’s so much nicer than the old echoes that you can’t help but smile. Your smile only grows when arms wrap around you and a soft kiss is pressed behind your ear.

“Thank you…” is all you can mumble and he chuckles, oh how you missed this. Being in his arms, not worrying about anyone else, goodness…

“Don’t thank me, it’s the least I can do for you.” You both sway gently with the boat and enjoy the peace. It’s not quiet but it’s almost better that way. You were tired of silence and the background noise of laughter and cursing was the best thing you could have imagined.

The peace can’t last though, as a rag hits J with a thunk and you hear cackling from the crew as he whips around to look for the culprit.

“You gonna introduce us to the broad? Or should I say hostage?” You snort and lean into schlatt at that, you supposed you were technically a hostage. That was gonna be hell to deal with.

“Right, boys, this is the asshole that stole my heart and so I stole them in return.” You smile and bow in the dramatic fashion, causing everyone to laugh with you.

“Little one, this is Connor and Alex. The idiots that I pay to keep this hunk of junk afloat. They don’t do very well, I’m thinking about shoving them over the side, what do you think?” He leans towards you conspiratorially and you raise your hand to hide your soft laughter.

Both Connor and Alex immediately jump in, trying to defend themselves and throw the other under the bus.

“It’s Connor’s fault that the hull is covered in shit! You told him to take care of it at last port and all he did was try to peddle the rotten barrels in storage!”

“Me? I swear you almost slept your way through our last three stops instead of pulling your weight!”

“Man, I outta-“ you and J both can’t help from laughing at the chaos. 

“I think you should keep them, they’re funny.” J rolls his eyes but shrugs. Alex smiles and throws a wink to you, 

“My thanks, I kinda need this job, unless you have a better offer?” You roll your own eyes and wave him off. 

“I’ll have to think about it, stud.” Alex fake swoons and Connor rushes over to catch him. They remind you of Tommy, and your smile falters. He would be so worried, he didn’t know this was what you wanted…

Schlatt picks up on your worry and pulls you to the side. He isn’t too pushy, hands gently resting on your shoulders and brows furrowed with concern.

“You’re ok, right? I never got the chance to check up on you.” You nod and smile, placing a hand over his.

“I’m fine, just- worried. You could get into deep shit for kidnapping me, love.” He just smiles and shakes his head. 

“It would be worth it for you. I’d force these fuckers to sail to the ends of the earth if it meant keeping you safe.” You lean up and kiss his cheek, a warm token of your thanks and affection.

“And I’ll never be able to repay you for that. You’ve saved me. My knight in tarnished armor.” The teasing dynamic was back and you couldn’t be more happy, even with the worry starting to cloud your brain.

—————

After a long morning of setting off, J finally pulls you below deck and out of the way of his crew. No matter how much you two could speak and tease and flirt with them around he still wanted to hide away before he could be vulnerable with you, honestly you were thankful for that.

He hugs you tight to his chest and let’s himself relax with you in his arms. You do the only thing you can and hug back even tighter. You were both desperate to prove to yourselves that it was real. That you wouldn’t be torn away from one another any time soon. It was the moment you both needed, and you let yourself cry softly into his chest. Neither of you would judge the other, not knowing what hell the other had been through in the weeks since the event…

He finally pulls away and kisses your forehead before leading you to sit down at a rickety table. He reaches out for your hand and you show him your wrists and fingers, discolored and tender. His face goes grim but he presses a soft kiss to your palm before moving to tend to them.

“Has he done anything else?” His voice is hoarse and low as he asks. You have to pause, should you tell him everything? It would only upset him more…

In all honesty you weren’t even sure where to start. The bruises were truly the only physical marks of Wilbur’s ‘affections’ but there were always the words he filled your thoughts with. The burning fear and confinement. And then there was the kiss… it hadn’t been the only one. But he never went further, thank proper society rules for that.

You look at Schlatt with damp eyes and sigh, this was going to be a doozy.

“He didn’t do any other harm, just- just his words.” Schlatt curses under his breath, gently wiping the tears from your eyes.

“I’ll kill the bastard. You don’t deserve to be hurt in any way, especially not by his words.” 

“It’s okay, J. I’m not there anymore, you’ve already done so much.”

“I could’ve been there sooner-“

“You were there in time to stop the worst of it. Don’t think anything less.” 

The silence stretches out and you hate it. You were both hurting from this and it was ridiculous. To let such a bastard have such control over you was too much. You walk around the table and move to sit in Schlatt’s lap.

“Just- please hold me. We don’t need to be thinking of that right now, I just want to be near you.” He smiles and wraps his arms around you once more.

The feeling chases the dark thoughts away and you curl up against him, listening to the soft beat of his heart. You would do anything to stay in this moment forever. It’s perfect and the quiet can’t hurt it. When you are this close the breathing and beating of both hearts keeps cold silence from engulfing you in it’s clutches.

It doesn’t break when he cups your cheek and looks back and forth between your eyes and your lips with a soft aching question. That was the difference. You would always have a choice with J, and it was so easy to make this choice. 

You lean in and catch his lips with yours. It’s warm and slow and full of every word the two of you wished to tell each other over the miles that had kept you apart. It was enough to warm you to the tips of your toes and chase away what leftover darkness was clinging to your thoughts.

It was beautiful and it was yours.

—————

Wilbur had thrown every spare second, every soldier he had into his plans. He needed you back, Phil wasn’t getting younger and he needed you to get what he wanted. It was the ONLY way. And schlatt would die for throwing a wrench into his perfect plans, stealing his perfect doe, taking what was rightfully his.

Techno was forced to watch from the sidelines, making any move against his brother’s plan would put him in the line of fire. Reveal that he had helped the kidnapping happen. It wasn’t worth it. They were gone and nothing could reverse that.

Tommy didn’t know what was going on except for the fact that his brother had lost the love of his life to some scum, and he wanted nothing more than to play the hero and get back what had been stolen.

Things were starting to take shape and it was going to be bigger than anything L’manburg had seen since the war. It was almost all Phil could do to keep tabs on his sons, so he was no help to anyone at this point. He had no reason to intervene yet, and he wasn’t going to pick sides.


	13. Slice Of Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know I said angst ahead, but why not have some more fluff while I plan for the next arc. I can hopefully promise more angst next update though

The days on the ship were the best in your memory. They were full of bright laughter and sun, soft moments and bold lines. It was the absolute picture of what you had always wanted.

You find yourself quickly adjusting to the life, even cutting up the frilly bits of your outfit to use in fixing the ship. Making rope was your best skill now, and even Connor was impressed by your speed.

You often find yourself climbing all over the ship, chasing after Alex for your shoe, helping Connor by carrying supplies when he needed an extra hand, or just wandering after J. Those were your favorite moments, when he just talks to you while he tries to be productive. You can’t do it often, both too much of a distraction for the other to be much use.

It’s another one of these perfect days, a bit more relaxed now that you were in neutral waters. Alex, Connor, and you all sit on deck, working on small tasks while J is actually working over by the rudder.

It’s Alex who breaks the silence by humming some soft tune under his breath. He had a habit of doing that, said it helped him focus on work.

It doesn’t take long for Connor to smile wide and drop his work. He starts drumming on a barrel nearby to start a steady rhythm, forcing Alex to sing louder to be heard. It’s wonderful to listen too as you work but the relaxing doesn’t last.

Both boys smile at you with eyebrows raised when you look up next. You look at them confused, were they expecting you to join?

“Come onnnn, all the stories we heard were about dancing!” Alex whines breaking the steady song

“Yeah! Schlatt wouldn’t stop talking about how amazing you are at it. We demand proof!” You snort and shake your head, trying to ignore their taunts.

They continue at it, Alex now working into the music.

“There once was a bitch who would not dance,  
even when we asked them nice,  
Their bastard of a man had real nice hands,  
We also wish that they had live” 

It’s not perfect, but it’s enough to make you laugh hard enough to put your work to the side. You stand up and brush the sand from your legs before you smile to the boys 

“Got anything better than that shit poetry?” You tease and Alex acts offended for a moment before diving back into the song.

You take a moment to think before you start to dance. It’s a simple enough song and you can easily match your footfalls to the beat. Soon enough you’re laughing along with them and spinning across the deck, not worried one bit about if this is real dance or not, if someone could see and judge, the only thing you find concern with is how purely happy you are in this moment.

Schlatt eventually comes to check on what all the noise is. He has to hide his smile when he sees his crew and you getting along so well. He was scared the two parts of his life wouldn’t mesh, but he was so happy to be wrong.

“What’s all this then? I’m running a ship not a tavern.” You smile up at him but keep on dancing. The other boys stick out their tongues or curse him out.

“We’re enjoying ourselves! You should try it! Your partner is way more fun than you.” Connor grins even as Schlatt stomps over, pretending to be mad.

It doesn’t take long for the facade to drop when you offer your hand. He immediately begins to dance along with you. The whole boat is alive with song and dance. It is wonderful.

This was more fun than any ball, more laughter than any festival, and the most genuine kindness you had experienced in years. You would never have expected the kinship that came from this ship, but it decided to come anyway. Nothing could ruin this bond.

——————

Later that night, when everyone is winding down, you’ve broken open some of their food stores and made some half decent food. The other three rush to eat as much as they can, so happy to not have to deal with burnt food for dinner. 

It makes you smile as you settle down beside schlatt. You already cared so much about them and to see them happy made you soft. It’s easy to just sit back and watch them talk, making jokes about their past that you had yet to learn about. It’s not until Alex registers the lack of your voice that he turns to you.

“We aren’t landing half these are we?” You shake your head and he smiles, “yer only missing half the story. I guess it makes sense you aren’t laughing.”

“Well who’s sharing first? I’ve got bets on-“

“Me!” Alex interrupts Connor 

“Yep, that’s the one” you all laugh. It takes a second to settle down but once you do Alex is in full dramatics ready to tell his story. 

“So! Schlatt basically picked me up at some random port. He didn’t mean to pick up anyone, he didn’t really need a crew at that point, his schtick was fine on his own. But I tried to con him” 

“He wasn’t very good at it either, who’s gonna believe a teenager that they’re a wealthy merchant with unusual wares.”

“PLENTY OF PEOPLE! Anyway! He figured me really quick. Kinda threatened me a bit for trying to con a con man, nothing too bad, but then he realized how young and smart and attractive I was-“

“Took pity on him.”

“-And he practically begged me to join-“

“Told his skinny ass I had food and a boat.”

“That’s the story of how I joined up with this asshole to terrorize the ocean!” You clap, smiling wide at the story. Schlatt’s comments just made it better and you can’t help but lean into him.

“My turn!” Connor grins, bouncing in his seat. You chuckle and nod, ready to hear another story even if you were starting to droop.

“My story is waaay better. I was already Schlatt’s friend, because I’m awesome from birth. But he left me. Like a douche.” You snort and Alex laughs despite having heard this story before

“So I was getting into some trouble back home, ya know, petty theft, forgery, small things compared to big guy over here. Well, I got into some trouble and wham bam alakazam he busts in like nobody's business and saves me!” He fake swoons back into his chair and Schlatt rolls his eyes, even though he can’t stop the grin on his face.

“Looks like you’re everyone’s hero.” You smile up at Schlatt who now had his arm around your shoulder. He was so warm and you wanted to stay curled up like this so you do the only thing you can think to keep this conversation rolling. 

“Why don’t you share how you got started J?” It’s a reasonable question but it makes the canon go silent. Schlatt tries to cover the tension by clearing throat and moving to stand. 

“I should go check the deck.” He states and almost trips over himself in his rush to leave. Your heart sinks and your gaze turns to your lap.

You fucked up. He’s going to come back and drag you to a room and leave you alone to deal with it. You should’ve known this wouldn’t last, you didn’t deserve it, you always fucked it up somehow and this was how it would happen this time. You should’ve never left-

“Hey? Are you okay?” Connor asks softly, causing you to look up with your eyes now full of tears. 

“Don’t worry about him, it’s not your fault.” Alex tries to console you, now full on panicked from the idea of you crying.

“Yeah, he’s just worried what you’ll think-“ he cuts off with a groan as he’s kneed by Alex 

“Shut up! You’re only gonna make them cry more idiot!”

“You’re the idiot! Bringing up story time like that!”

“Boys-“ you interject with a tired and sad smile, “it’s no one's fault. I’m gonna go check on him, alright?” They both smile and nod, happy you weren’t stuck in your own head again.

You walk up to the deck, wringing your hands nervously. The same thoughts try to bust down your walls but your concern for J outweighs them all. You find him by the wheel with his head in his hands. 

“I’m sorry I brought it up J…” you mumble and he looks up with a weary grin.

“It’s no big deal, little one. You didn’t know.” He reaches an arm out and you curl up into his side immediately. It’s cold out here in the dark, and you hold back from shivering so you can stay in his arms.

“Do you want to watch the stars with me for a bit? I don’t mind the company.” You nod.

The two of you spend a good while just watching the waves and the sky, occasionally J will point out a constellation or particular star and you can’t help but smile. He was so soft when the two of you were alone, you couldn’t help but melt.

After a while it’s impossible to hold back the shivering and J realizes just how cold it would be for you. 

“Let’s go inside, it’s too cold out here for you. Especially in those clothes, we need to get you something for the weather. Anything is better than what that bastard put you in” he kisses your forehead and you burrow further into his arms shaking your head. 

“Wanna fall asleep here. And you tell me about the sky…” you already knew about the stars but hearing him talk about it made you want to relearn. 

“Okay, alright. But I’m carrying you inside as soon as you fall asleep.” You nod and yawn as he starts back up speaking again. It doesn’t take long for your eyes to droop and to be softly snoring against his chest.

——————

True to his word he picks you up as soon as you’re out of it. He doesn’t need you getting sick, he’s already so worried about you. It’s truly awful how much space in his thoughts you take up, but he wouldn’t trade it for anything.

That’s why when he sees a strange ship in the distance it sets him on edge. There shouldn’t be anyone out here. You weren’t safe anymore, but he wasn’t going to wake you up. 

He ends up carrying you down to his bunk and tucking you in tightly, hoping you wouldn’t wake with the fuss he was about to put on. Hopefully the boys would be able to help without too much chaos.


	14. Storm on The Horizon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So I hate this chapter, but hopefully next chapter I can be back in my comfort zone of writing. Which means a certain asshole will be back.

You wake up to warm sunlight over your face and an empty room. You almost start to sink into the bed, thinking you would be alone for hours, before you feel the gentle rocking of the waves. You open your eyes with a smile. 

J must have already gotten up to work on the ship, such a busybody. It makes it very easy for you to get up, though, with the idea of seeing him. You take your time, slowly stretching and unwinding from the sheets.

Suddenly a thunk from above you sounds and you bolt from the room. That wasn’t the normal someone dropped something noise, that was heavier. You have to raise a hand to shield your eyes from the sun but as soon as you step out you can see the chaos.

Alex is trying to ready cannons and Connor is patching up any weak points in the ship. Both are going as quickly as possible and don’t even register you as awake. J is trying to increase the speed of the boat but the wind is not in his favor. He’s just about to throw a fit when he spots you and frowns.

“Sorry, did we wake you? I was hoping we’d be out of this mess sooner..” he seems tired but you don’t even know what he’s talking about.

“You didn’t- it was quite peaceful but you know I can help.”

“I know but these guys are bad news-“

“Awful news! These guys hate us, we kinda…” Alex tries to interrupt 

“We aren’t just wanted in L’manburg little one, the whole kingdom doesn’t really like us.”

“For good reason? Or just a general dislike.” You hope it’s the latter, you can try diplomacy if it comes down to it but if they have actual reason to hate J, that makes it so much harder.

“Well….” J starts but Alex chuckles nervously.

“We may have, maybe, kind of, stolen from King George and King Eret. Nothing tooooo big…”

“Just show them the damn thing!” Connor interjects in passing. More nervous laughter and Alex pulls open a crate and pulls out a ceremonial sword.

“Alex! I told you to sell that thing!”

“I didn’t like the prices I was getting!”

You can’t help but bury your face in your hand. If they were concerned about the sword it meant it wasn’t L’manburgs navy, it was the royal fleet. And you wouldn’t be able to use diplomatic skills to win this one, with the evidence on board for two major crimes.

Kidnapping you though, it shouldn’t have brought as many ships as it did. You still didn’t have the title from your parents, nor did you marry into Wilbur’s…. that bastard. He was using the engagement to classify it as a higher crime. You groan and start to pace.

“Do you know who’s leading the fleet yet? If they had techno do it we may have a chance still-“

“Dream.”

Shit. 

———————

The four of you take what little time you have left and scurry over the ship, finding whatever you can to help with the fight. However, as soon as the fleet gets close enough to be an immediate threat J takes you aside.

“Please, just hide in my quarters, it’s gonna get messy and I don’t think I could stand to see you hurt-“

“I’m helping. You three won’t be able to defend the ship on your own.” You cross your arms and glare. He just sighs.

“It’s gonna be rough, you have to promise not to be risky. That’s my job.” You nod and kiss his cheek quick before hopping over to help Connor.

Soon enough you are rushing to patch a new hole. The fleet had already started shooting the cannons.

It’s a whirlwind of fixing holes before leaks start, grabbing guns for the boys, and eventually you find yourself scrambling up the mast to avoid being grabbed by the boarders. You look up to see a dark rolling sky.

Thankfully Dream hadn’t joined the main fight yet-

You spoke too soon as you felt your foot being grabbed. You look down to see a masked man already yanking you down and throwing you over his shoulder.

You kick and throw a fit trying to get him to drop you. Pulling and hitting does nothing.

“Careful. You and the sword are all I’m supposed to get from this shipwreck in motion.” The masked man chuckles darkly.

He has to draw his sword quick when J spots him and blasts a shot in his direction.

“Drop them Dream. You’re making a mistake.” Both stand off against the other. You can’t even watch from your position. It’s ridiculous.

You manage to struggle enough that Dream has to drop you. Landing with a grunt and scrambling back up. When you look back to them they’re still staring.

The boat sways harder and a sudden strong gust of wind puts everyone off balance. Connor is the one to tell as he pushes a few soldiers into the water.

“STORM! WE GOTTA GET TO LAND” before Dream can stop you, you are running to the wheel and taking control of the ship.

A furious fight breaks out as soldiers now struggle to get back to their own boats. Dream refuses to do the same and yells about following to shore. Schlatt shoots a few rounds at fleeing backs, but none of them hit. 

The sheer speed everything happens at makes it hard to spot everything, but you don’t have to. Focusing on keeping the ship afloat and headed off is your only goal.

——————

Eventually you pull into a seemingly abandoned port with Schlatt’s help even if he’d rather be beating Dream into the ground. He never left the boat, preferring to search it for the stolen loot.

He had found it, but that was beside the point. 

The storm had made travel quick, rough wind giving incredible speed. Connor and Alex fixed what damage had been done in the fight and were now watching carefully for the fleet. It seemed somehow Dream had called them off…

“Schlatt. Just give up, they’re going to come with me.” 

“No! Why would I do that?” It’s just the same back and forth from the two of them until you step in.

“Dream. I chose this, it isn’t a kidnapping.”

“Wait, but Wilbur said-“

“He lied. You already called off the fleet, can you just leave and let us go?” You would almost beg at this point. You just wanted to go back to how it was the night before, not this. The rain beating down in sheets, no way to get back out for at least the day.

“Well- I can leave. But only once the storm is over, I’m not putting myself in any more danger if no one else is.” He huffs and sits on a nearby barrel, J doing almost the exact same motion. 

So it was settled. You would deal with him for a day and then you would leave. It seemed everything could return to what it was.

———————

Hell was what it would be. 

That’s what schlatt had asked for, with stealing Wilbur’s Fiancé. He had already been alerted to their position, no longer on the ocean he could take back what was his, easy.

Techno would be too much trouble to bring so he drags along his kid brother, who was so easy to fill with rage and have find the quickest way to his goal. It would be so much fun to watch Schlatt burn with hatred as he took back his doe. And Tommy would be able to put his hero complex to work 

He could practically taste victory on the wind, and nothing would stand in his way.


	15. He’s Back...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I said back to comfortable territory, so here we are!

Dream was useless.

You should’ve figured that out from the moment he asked for food and wouldn’t get off his ass to help clean up the ship. And you should’ve expected nothing less from the husband of the king. Typical spoiled man behavior, though you wouldn’t have acted much differently if you didn’t love this life.

You complain about him with Alex and Connor and they keep your spirits up. It’s refreshing to see them so jolly even after the storm and the assault. It’s so simple for them, no worries about politics, you wish you’d had that your entire life. 

“Enough about Mr. Prince Consort, how are you holding up? First naval battle and you rocked it!” Alex bumps his shoulder to yours, “I’d say even Schlatt was impressed.” You hide your grin and blush softly.

“Oh you, stop flirting or I’ll get J over here.” Alex holds up his hands in defense and Connor cackles at him.

“I wasn’t doin nothin-“

“What’s this I hear about flirting? With my little one? You got a death wish?” The smile gives away that he’s joking but you all immediately fall into the bit, jumping in to defend Alex, or you draping yourself over J dramatically, begging him to save you.

It’s a sweet moment, but a sickening crack pulls you all out of it.

“Sounds like you should get some supplies.” Dream chimes in from his spot, a teasing grin on his face.

“Sounds like you should shut your trap!” Connor cuts back, all of you snickering but quickly standing to do just that. 

“We should get something to fix the damage. New wood couldn’t hurt and we can split up to have an easier time of it.” J admits and wraps his arm around your shoulders.

“Sir yes sir,” Alex gives a mocking salute and you all departe, Alex and Connor going one way and you with J in the other. It seemed simple enough.

——————

You walk next to J, hand in hand. The port isn’t exactly abandoned, just a very very low population. You and Schlatt had only come across one person and they were patching up a window from the storm.

There were a few stray boards that you were now lugging around as well, anything was better than the current situation. The quiet was nice, and it gives you an idea. You set the boards down and turn to J with a grin.

He pauses, confused until you wrap your arms around his waist.

“Oh? I know I’m attractive, but damn little one. Here?” He teases but leans down to press a soft kiss to your lips. 

You smile against his and let yourself melt. The ship wasn’t cohesive with alone time, so this was the best moment for this. His hand starts to move to your lower back, a bit cheeky but you don’t mind, when a shout is heard from a little ways away.

He pulls away and groans, leaning his head against yours.

“Come on, I swear I’m gonna kill them someday.” You laugh and kiss his cheek. 

“We should probably go check on them, they could be in some actual trouble.” You both pick up what you had dropped for your moment of quiet and head off in the direction of the shout.

The walk over is pretty much the same as your entire time on land so far until you spot a soldier darting away from the corner of your eye. You pull on Schlatt’s sleeve to warn him but before you can you hear another shout.

“Fuck off! They aren’t even here!” You hear Alex and you both take off in that direction. It doesn’t take long to find where they are, but seeing it makes your stomach drop.

The first person you see in the clearing is a familiar blond boy with a stupid grin. Your whole chest aches at seeing him again, at least he was safe, but then you see Wilbur.

He looked absolutely mad, eyes wide and sword to the throats of your newest friends. You can’t help the weak noise that escapes your throat and Schlatt has already started to pull you behind him. 

Connor spots you first and rolls his eyes, of course you two had to show up at the worst time. They had both heard about how Wilbur had treated you and were just as protective as J. 

Tommy is next, when he sees the reaction form Connor. He turns and his grin turns cold when he sees Schlatt holding you.

“Let them go you bastard!” He raises a sword in such a similar way to Wilbur that it makes you flinch away. He sees this and gets even more riled up, thinking it’s Schlatt’s doing.

Wilbur is quick to turn at this, sending Alex into a tizzy at how close the blade came to his neck. Wilbur doesn’t care though, as soon as he sees you he relaxes. He puts on those kind eyes that you had originally found so sweet. It doesn’t work anymore, the bruises a closer memory than his kindness.

“Doe… I’m glad to see you haven’t run off with them Schlatt. It would be smart of you to let them go though.” He’s so self righteous in this moment, motioning for guards to circle back and prevent either of you from running.

“I’m not doing anything of the sort. You should let my crew go soon though. They don’t like traps.” It was going to be another pissing match wasn’t it.

Wilbur and Schlatt continue on, but Tommy starts to slink over to try and grab you. You shake your head and press closer to J when he tries to grab you. He looks absolutely confused, and it only gets worse when Schlatt trips backing up and immediately moves to protect you from the fall.

“Doe, why would you even want to be with this- this criminal? Don’t you know you’re safer with me?” The direct question to you pulls you back into the conversation. 

“I don’t care, he’s just a thief, it’s nothing I’m worried about.” Wilbur laughs, it’s maniacal as he steps closer to hover over the two of you, now thoroughly cornered.

“A THIEF? THAT'S THE LIE YOU TOLD? HA!” He brings his sword up to inspect it like he hasn’t a care in the world. “I bet you didn’t even tell them why you’re on the run, like the coward you are.”

“I was-“

“You were WHAT? HUH? HIDING THAT YOU'RE A GODDAMN MURDERER?” He snaps once more, making you flinch and making Schlatt angrier.

“J- is that? Is he telling the truth?”

“Little one, I-“

“STOP ASKING HIM! HE'S JUST A- he’s nothing but a villain my love, just leave him and come with me.” Wilbur offers his hand but you won’t look, too busy scanning J’s face.

“It was an accident..”

“A murder, you bastard. And now a kidnapping. You won’t get away so easy.”

Tommy is now using the fighting as a distraction to try and pull you away. You both know this is on the verge of a physical fight but you don’t want to move to leave Schlatt defenseless.

Too bad for you as soon enough schlatt has to let go to grab his sword and Tommy pulls you away. Not without struggle. You can’t bear to just sit and watch what happens next.

They are immediately up in arms at each other, blades in a flurry of motion. You can’t stand every rough clang of metal and Tommy can barely hold you back as blood is drawn from both.

Neither wants to let up and you can’t do anything. For a moment you let yourself go slack, but as soon as Tommy relaxes you push forward and try to stop the altercation.

It hurts, is all you can think when the blade hits your side. You knew you would get hit, that was the chance you were taking, but you never expected it to be by J’s blade.

You crumple you the ground with a whimper and Schlatt is immediately holding you, trying to put pressure on the wound. 

You fade in and out as he starts to cry, begging you to forgive him. It’s awful to watch you be the cause of his pain and you reach up a weak hand to his cheek.

Wilbur doesn’t let this stand, his sword coming to Schlatt’s throat with no time wasted. Tommy is trying to pull Wil away, the blade so close to you as well, and he was panicking at how weak you looked.

“You hurt them. How can you call yourself worthy when you make them bleed.” His smile is wide as he forms a plan.

“I’ll make you a deal Schlatt. You are a businessman and I trust you’ll know the right choice when you hear it. Let me have my fiancé, hand them over with no fight and you can have your men and your freedom to run.”

Alex and Connor make noises of dissent from behind, saying they’ll be fine, or don’t worry, the broad is more important. It doesn’t make the choice any easier.

One look at Schlatt and you can see the turmoil. Anyone could tell that if he chose you his crew, his family would die, but if he chose them- he knew just how awful your life would be. The pure agony he knew you experienced, but was he any better? You were bleeding in his lap and barely conscious.

You groan and smile up at him. You knew he wouldn’t do well without Alex and Connor. And you would find a way to survive. One life for two, what better deal would you get? 

“J, let me go.”

“Doll, I-“

“Please… I don’t want to cause anyone else pain… I love you..” it’s a labor to get out and Schlatt can’t stop the tears from falling as he clings to you.

“I- Tommy?” He looks to the teen with pleading eyes. “Keep them safe for me, okay?” Tommy nods and is shocked to find Schlatt handing you over, not to Wil, but to him.

Wil tries to grab, but Schlatt stops him.

“My only ask is that the kid take them back. I don’t trust you one bit Wilbur.” He glares but backs down. 

One last look to J is all you can manage before the pain becomes too much and you let yourself slip into unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who’s ready for manipulation arc 2.0! I am!


	16. It’s Official

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back to manipulation, my favorite! But this time reader is a bit more prepared, and they have a secret weapon

You wake up with a splitting headache and a dull throbbing pain in your side. It’s too dark to actually see where you are so you move to feel where the wound was. It’s easy to feel the bandages wrapped around your torso but it’s a shock to hear a grunt when you move.

Your first thought is to J, but then you remember. He had let you go…

You had asked for it, yes, but it didn’t numb the pain. And it only gets worse when your eyes adjust and you see Wilbur watching you from a few feet away. It wasn’t him who made the noise though, it was Tommy, who was still holding you loosely. It was a strange situation and you couldn’t tell where you were, the pain crowding your senses. 

You barely even register that Tommy’s hand has moved to brush hair away from your face. Or that he’s started to speak at a low rumble.

“We’ll all be back soon Wilbur, relax a little bit.” He tries to lighten the mood but it does nothing.

“I would if you would let me hold them. Doe is my fiancé after all…” he plays up the second half of the statement to try and gain pity. Tommy just shuffles you closer and shakes his head.

“We- we made a deal. Even if it was with Schlatt, we made a deal.” Wilbur just grumbles halfheartedly and finally turns his gaze from you. It seemed neither had noticed your waking. No hair off your back, you would rather sleep through this than interact with either.

———————

The next time you wake you’re in a bed. It’s so warm and comfortable and you find it almost impossible to wake up. Waking up meant facing that empty room and all the trappings of your new life.

You grunt and start to curl deeper into the covers when a laugh startles you from your hazy state. You bolt upright and wince at the pain from your sudden movement. All too quickly the owner of that laugh is by your side and pushing you to lie back down.

“Hush my love, it’s alright. You’re safe now.” Wilbur’s hands feel like ice as he caresses your cheek. You want to slap it away and hiss out a warning to stay away.

It ends up you can’t, and you just end up whimpering and sniffling, tears now falling to his hand. He can’t hide the smile on his face as he wipes them away and leans in to kiss your forehead.

“I know, I know, my doe. He’s gone, he can’t hurt you anymore.” You turn your head away from him so he can’t take your pained expression as some form of sick praise and thanks for ‘saving’ you.

“....I want to go back…” you mutter, voice rough with sleep. He just sighs and pulls you to look at him. The soft touches are gone, he’s back to his strict affections.

“I see he corrupted you more than I thought… if this keeps up I may have to be the only one to rehabilitate you..” the threat is obvious in his voice. Isolation again. You wouldn’t be able to handle it, so you whine and raise your hand to catch his wrist.

“Please no… I’ll- I won’t bring him up again… just don’t- don’t leave me alone,” you resort to begging and he grins. He wasn’t even trying to hide his nature anymore, not while you two were alone at the very least.

“Good little one.” The nickname burns from the wrong person, it feels like he’d flung acid at you with just two words. “Then I suppose I can let Tommy come check on you, he’s been so…. needy about it.” Of course he wouldn’t let you see Techno… but Tommy, Tommy would be a good person to talk to.

“...thank you..” he smiles, a dark look in his eyes. 

“Anything for you, as long as you listen to me, doe.” It’s all you can do to nod. You want to curl up and sleep again, but you knew he wouldn’t let you.

You’re correct because, as he does stand up and let you curl up, he immediately moves to the door and opens it. Tommy almost falls inside and you chuckle.

“You’re okay! Er- well of course you are! We saved you.” He smiles as he gets up and you return it. You offer a hand and he practically runs over to sit next to you.

He’s such a sweet kid, even as he rambles a bit too loud about how awesome the rescue mission was. You look over to Wilbur, his eyes cold as he watches you and you give him a weak smile. 

Letting yourself play into his ideas was the only way you would be able to survive this. You could already see how listening to him would help, but you couldn’t just do everything he asked… you needed a plan.

You look back to Tommy and a quiet thought begins to form. He could do more than just keep you company… he was such a smart kid, if only you could get him out from under Wilbur’s thumb.

———————

You eventually realize that the room you are housed in isn’t the one from your first stay. It’s a room connected to Wilbur’s. However much you appreciate the larger windows, the balcony, the warmer atmosphere, the idea of him being behind the wall from you is awful. You get no rest.

Which isn’t exactly good, your first few days back are spent stuck inside that room. It’s supposed to be to recover, but you spend most of the time either sleeping, being fawned over by Wilbur, or talking to Tommy.

He had been such a comfort, telling you stories about Techno, or about his friend Tubbo. He had such a good support system, and you were living on hope for him. If you could pull him away from Wil, you knew he could keep you from falling into the same state you’d been in before. He could keep you fighting.

It was one of your many conversations with him, spent on the balcony, perched on the railing, when Wilbur suddenly appears in the doorway. This wasn’t unusual, but his grin was.

“Tommy, you are the first to hear some amazing news!” You furrow your brow but Tommy jumps up and down excitedly.

“Oooooh, you have to tell me! I hate to say it, I mean I don’t, but I was getting bored” his cheeky grin keeps you from smacking his shoulder. You had mostly healed so the effort wouldn’t cause you pain.

“I am right this very second making our engagement official,” he kneels down in front of you and pulls a ring from his pocket and grabs your hand, a bit too tightly, “you are healed enough to be back in the public eye. And then there’s the matter of needing to be engaged for so long before the wedding…”

You can’t tear your gaze from the ring. It’s opulent and gorgeous but all you could see was a chain. Your smile is forced and Tommy sees it, his own features growing worried despite Wil’s excitement.

You two lock eyes and he can see the aching in your gaze. After so long he knew you better than anyone else in the estate. He also trusted you more than he did Wilbur anymore. The things you said conflicted so often that he’d had to pick a side, and very recently that side became yours.

“Of course Wil… I love it. Am I to make an appearance at dinner tonight?” You force your voice light and sweet before he goes into a ramble about how you should dress for the meal tonight.

“Con-congrats guys, I’m so happy for you, but Wilbur…. we were in the middle of a conversation…” Wilbur stops and glares at Tommy. He opens his mouth to snap at his brother but you put a hand on his chest to stop it.

“Please Wil, my love. The loudness gives me a headache. I promise we can talk more after dinner.” The pet name calms him and he relaxes. He lifts your hand and presses a kiss to your knuckles before leaving.

You look at Tommy and both burst out laughing.

“Ooo, big man so angry, I wasn’t scared. Not me!” He was so quick with a joke and it never failed to bring up your spirits. 

Tommy demands to help you pick out clothes, saying something about being amazing at everything so he must be good at clothes too. You hated knowing that he would be across the table from you and you wouldn’t see him again until tomorrow, so you let him stay as long as possible.

Even if he joked and laughed, you both knew that you had become each other’s touchstones. You would do anything the other asked, because no one else would.


	17. Dinner Isn’t Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have lots of Tommy bonding because I love the kid and I’m sad about the current plot. He needs some happiness, so I’m writing him some.... later, gotta hurt him first.

Tommy gets to escort you to dinner that night, as a treat to you both. You lean on him a little bit more than necessary, but you wanted to save what strength you had so you wouldn’t have to later when Wilbur walked you back.

Phil greets you with a warm hug, being one of those not allowed to see you. His hug is gentle, trying to be careful not to hurt you. Everyone treated you like glass, except for Tommy. You’d gotten used to it.

Before you can even look to Techno for a greeting you are pulled down to your seat next to Wilbur. You let out a soft squeak and wince, trying to cover it with a cough.

“We’re all very glad to have you back, Wilbur was in such a mood without you.” Phil redirects the conversation from where it would have no doubt ended up if the silence had lasted much longer.

“I’m glad to be back, I just missed you all so much.” You spare a quick glance to techno to find him frowning. It hurts to lie so blatantly but you have to live with this now.

The conversation stays polite and either Phil or Wilbur keep the topic off of your time away. Phil mostly to keep you comfortable. Wilbur to keep from getting too angry. Everytime the conversation gets close his hand tightens on yours. You bite your cheek to keep from making faces.

It’s not until Techno finally gets tired of the dancing around the topic that it gets really bad.

“So it really was Schlatt that did that to you?” You cough at the sudden bluntness as well as the grip on your fingers.

“Y-yes, during the rescue…”

“I don’t think he meant to though-“ Tommy tries to interject, thinking back to how broken Schlatt had looked when you had fallen.

“He still is the one to hurt them.” Wilbur is gritting his teeth as he speaks and you can’t fight back the whimper bubbling out of your throat.

Tommy frowns, and it only grows worse when you make a noise. He crosses his arms and huffs at being brushed off.

“Wilbur-“ you try to get his attention and his gaze whips to you, “please.. it’s okay…” he growls but lets your hand go.

“Let’s not talk about it, it seems a touchy subject.” Phil back on his peacekeeping duties with a tired smile.

“Let’s not. But thank you for the concern Techno.” You offer a smile, your hand quickly getting taken again so Wilbur can have some grounding in the fact you were still there.

Tommy was still pouting and he obviously had more to say on it. You meet his eyes and shake your head to keep him quiet.

The dinner continues to progress, moving on to topics like the wedding, or Technos next battle plans. It can only last so long, with Wilbur still bruising your fingers every so often, and the fact that you had stopped speaking to just stare at the table after a while.

Tommy is the one to break the peace. Of course he is.

“I just think that Schlatt can’t be that bad a guy-“

“WHAT?” 

“He seemed like he was trying to keep everyone safe…”

“Shut up! You don’t know anything!” Wilbur snaps and you Yelp when his nails draw blood on your palm.

“Stop! You’re hurting them!” Tommy is now standing and ready to fight.

“They don’t care, right doe?”

“R-right Wil-“

“STOP LYING TO ME WILBUR! IT'S NOT FAIR” Tommy doesn’t have anyone to hold him back like you are holding back Wilbur at that moment. The hand he isn’t crushing on his shoulder and you have to look away to hold back tears.

“Tommy. You should go.” Phil speaks up and Tommy just looks to him  
In shock.

“Dad, wh- it's not my fault!”

“Just- please Tommy.” He storms off in a rage, yelling obscenities as soon as he’s out the room.

You take your hand off his shoulder to wipe at your eyes. The sudden silence is more than you can handle and you had lost any appetite you’d had left.

“Wil… may I be excused? I’m not sure I’m feeling completely well anymore.” He lets go of your hand and nods tensely.

“I know you’re going to go find him. Just be back in the room by the time I’m ready for bed.” You nod and press a soft kiss to his cheek, standing up and cradling your newly hurt hand.

You were shaking with relief from being able to leave. You couldn’t stand their pity for another moment, nor Wilbur’s sickly sweet apologies.

———————

You end up outside, after a good while of searching. He wasn’t trying to leave a trail so it made him a little harder to track down. Eventually though, you find him.

Little muddy footprints across the stone path, problem branches in his way, and of course, now the soft sniffling from his hiding place. You have to crane your neck up to see him. 

The tree is tall but would be easy enough to climb, so you toss your shoes to the side and only make the mistake of using your bad hand once before you speed up to sit on a branch close to him.

“I’m sorry I made him so mad, I have a bad habit of doing that but I don’t like how he treats you…” his damp eyes look straight through you and you offer your hand to hold. The uninjured one. You didn’t need him feeling guilty for that. 

“He’s a good man, it’s okay to feel upset though.”

“He’s not good though! I hate to think about how he treats you when none of us are around!” He sniffles.

“It’s not that bad Tom-“

“I don’t care, I know you’re lying too. You can lie to him and to yourself but don’t lie to me please? I can’t handle it- I’m supposed to protect you..”

“Tommy… you know you don’t have to, it was a last ditch effort…” you both sniffle and wipe at your eyes. Apparently this tree had some spill your secrets aura.

“I want to. You are such a nice person and I can’t bear to see you like this.” He hugs you, shaking the tree slightly. You hug back and let yourself ache for what you’d lost, but pull back with a smile.

“Thank you. You mean the world to me, I wouldn’t be able to handle Wil without you.” 

The two of you spend quite a while in that tree, eventually deciding it would be your safe place. It would be where you couldn’t be touched by Wil and other drama. You both need it, but use the excuse of helping the other.

Eventually he hops down and helps you. The stress of the night had drained more energy than you’d thought originally, so you lean heavily into him once more. He makes you laugh all the way up to your door. 

It’s with a resigned smile that you part with him and step inside. You take a breath before turning around, hoping to find the room still empty.

It’s not.

Wilbur sits at your vanity with a frown. His eyes catch yours in the mirror and you immediately drop your head. You’d failed his one instruction for the night, and you pay the consequences.

You don’t mind so much, the moments with Tommy worth so much more than he could take from you.


	18. A Moment of Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I give you soft bonding because I have a lot of bonding feelings and I want to adopt all of the kids on the server.

That night was rough, but the excuse that the dinner had put too much stress on you keeps anyone from being suspicious of your disappearance. You were confined to bed for a day, but even afterwards you didn’t quite have the strength to leave without someone helping you.

The biggest problem was that your wound had reopened, but the new scratches on your arms and legs are hidden easily enough once they stop bleeding. The only good thing to come out of the event was that Wilbur left you alone. He didn’t dote on you and care for the bruising and bleeding. It’s a confusing change at first, but then you realize. He wanted the memory to stick. He wanted you to remember what happened when you didn’t listen despite his kindness.

Tommy can’t be kept away, despite being told over and over that his outburst was the reason you’d gotten so weak. In fact, he climbed up to your balcony so many times during your rest that you just left the door open for him to walk in. 

He always just strolled right in, hopping over to sit next to you in bed. He always had some story to tell about Tubbo.

“He got stung by a bee today. He started to cry and I thought it was because it hurt until he said it was because the bee had died! What an idiot!”

“He told me that this muddy salve stuff should help with the bruises on your hands, couldn’t tell me what’s in it though. Probably didn’t know”

“I beat him in a sword fight today! Mostly cause he sucks, but I still did it!”

You almost felt like Tubbo was there in your room as well. He seemed like such a good kid and you were glad Tommy had someone other than you. You couldn’t always just let him in. When Wilbur was around you tried to keep them apart. 

It was easy enough in the beginning, Wilbur spending most of his time away from you, but soon he got back into his clingy, overly sweet persona.

It made it difficult when he would suddenly appear in the doorway with tea and bandages to dress your wounds and Tommy is in the middle of giving you a demonstration of how well he can stab things.

Usually Tommy steps down and skitters off, but you still hate that Wilbur can chase off your happiness so very easily. He shouldn’t be able to hold such power if all he does with it is hurt and control the people he has power over. Thankfully Techno was the oldest so he should inherit the title from Phil.

Currently, you were sat at the mirror, changing your own bandages. You like to do what you can for yourself, the simple work reminding you of those few precious days. Tommy had yet to arrive that morning so you were going to try and surprise him with a trip outside. 

Of course you still had to dress in whatever Wilbur picked, but you didn’t really care too much at the moment. The fancy clothes would deal with whatever you put them through if you were forced to wear.

As soon as you finish getting ready there’s a noise out on the balcony. You laugh when you hear a groan. Moving to the door you see Tommy trying to pull someone else up onto the stone as well.

Another young kid, must be Tubbo. You were finally meeting him and you can already feel yourself melting. Both of them were definitely becoming like little brothers to you, without your permission. Honestly, awful. How dare they be so sweet.

You can’t fight the snort when they fall on top of one another and scramble to get up. Tommy smiles seeing you up already, and Tubbo hides behind him.

“Morninnng, I brought a friend because, no offense, I was getting bored having to tell you all the stories.”

“It’s okay, Honestly, I’m looking forward to hanging out with Tubbo more than you-“ you tease and you laugh when he punches your shoulder.

“Hi- I’m Tubbo, I heard you needed some friends for some reason. I’ll be your friend!” He smiles, still hidden and bouncing in excitement.

“Hello dear, it’s nice to meet you. I believe I still owe you a thanks for the salve,” you gesture to the small pot on your table, “it’s been a lot of help” he smiles proudly and comes out from behind his friend a bit more.

“If it is not too much to ask, why do you need it? I haven’t seen you out with Tommy, or even with Techno.” Tommy frowns first and starts to berate his friend for being too pushy before you hush him.

“It’s alright Tubbo, I got into an accident when Wilbur came to take me back. A friend of mine hurt me on accident when he was trying to protect me and his other friends…” you smile sadly, “and Wilbur would have me say I’m clumsy, but I’d say it’s him that’s more unaware of his own strength.”

“I said to stop lying to me,” Tommy mumbles and you sigh, sitting down.

“Why does Tommy think you’re lying?”

“Cause I am. Wilbur isn’t the nicest to me, because I don’t listen to all his rules. He doesn’t like that and tends to take it out on me.”

Both boys go silent. It was the first time you had actually admitted it out loud. It was nice to have it out in the air but it still hurt to think.

“I’m sorry, you can always come with me and Tommy when we finally get to leave on our adventure! We’ll protect you! I’ll make my own country where no one gets hurt.” Tubbo’s smile is infectious and you all end up laughing and planning your future escape.

Just the three of you out on the roads. It would be such a freeing existence, and you would love to pretend you could have that. But you all really knew that you couldn’t join them. You would be married by then, maybe have higher responsibilities than would let you travel…

But you could all pretend for now. It made everything so much easier.

——————

You do eventually end up outside. It’s mostly you walking along the path and watching the boys weave in and out around trees and bushes, pushing each other into the dirt and pretending to fight. 

“To your right Tubbo! He’s weak on that side!” You shout, cheering for Tubbo as he lands a good hit. The fresh air is good for you and you debate running alongside the boys. The wind would feel even better as would the dirt beneath your feet.

You decide, rather than running and play fighting, to sit in the grass right next to a pond. It’s the most destructive you can be without actively trying. Perfect.

You let the chaos fade into the background as you watch the clouds move above you. You can almost imagine you are still on the ship with the soft noises of the pond and imagining the feeling of wood beneath you.

You start to cry softly, not making much noise and a smile still on your face. You could imagine Tommy and Tubbo running around with Alex and Connor. It was so vivid in your mind that it made you ache for something that could never happen. 

You feel the ache so deeply, letting it fester and burn. Maybe it would burn out your hope. If you let that happen life would be so much easier. No more fighting, no more thoughts of him… you’d be happy… but no. You let it ache, you let it burn, but you won’t let this take away your hope no matter how much it would appease Wilbur.

The tears haven’t stopped by the time something blocks the sun from your face. You blink up to see Techno staring down at you. You hadn’t seen him alone yet, this was going to be interesting.

“Why are you in the mud?”

“I like it. And the boys are close enough that if I need help to get up I can.” You are both being very blunt, but still somehow avoiding the elephant in the room.

“Is he- are you healing okay?” Still avoiding it.

“All thanks to your brother.” You don’t specify which one, but the way his head lifts to look at his youngest brother you know he understands.

“Okay. Just- hmm” you chuckle and sit up so you aren’t looking directly up at him.

“It’s alright. I know I can come to you for help, you’re just harder to access with my specific restrictions..” he nods, letting the quiet, or what quiet exists with the boys running rampant, just sit. 

It takes a long moment for him to sit down next to you. It’s a soft moment and it makes the tears start back up. You both lean against one another, and you love this moment, but you wish it was someone else. 

At least Wilbur hadn’t ruined today. You would go back to the room that night and promise you hadn’t seen techno, and sit so pretty for Wilbur to dote on once more. He could take your freedom, but he couldn’t take the joy you carved out for yourself.

You wouldn’t let him.


	19. Was it All a Lie?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I asked my wife and she said angst, soooooo, have some heavy gaslighting.

By the time you get up the mud on your shoes and clothes has dried, flaking off as you walk. Techno is the one to help you stand, teasing his brother by saying he didn’t know how to be gentle, unlike the great warrior Technoblade. 

You all dissolved into laughter. It’s the perfect way to end your brief stint outdoors. Even within the walls of the estate the four of you can’t stop trying to find ways to cause chaos or laughter.

It’s like they know you don’t want to return, and you wish you had the strength to thank them for it. Especially when Tubbo grabs your hand and starts dancing down the hallway at some breakneck speed. Apparently it was some new dance that you hadn’t been taught, but it was so fun! The way you both skipped around the floor, causing Tommy to cackle when you almost fall into a wall. 

Tommy is the one who coerces Tubbo to climb into the food stores with him to get snacks for your indoor adventures. They almost get caught by a cook, but you play distraction. Techno was uselessly staring at the wall while you hold back laughter at the two boys running down the hall with shirts full of food. 

You all curl up in a windowsill, everyone crowded in and trying to cover mouths full of food with hands before you laugh. Techno was at least a bit more composed, but even he can’t help but smile at the chaos.

Just as you start to feel the exhaustion of the day sink in you all hear voices down the hall. Phil is one of them, low and cheery, trying to keep whatever conversation bright. You just let your head fall back to hit the wall when you recognize the other. 

Tubbo sighs and mouths a quick ‘I’m sorry’ before grabbing Tommy and skittering off. Good. Tommy does look back with a worried gaze but you just smile. He deserves to be able to run off. Techno doesn’t walk away, but sits down across from you, hiding the stolen food and starting up a random conversation.

“The art of war is a fantastic piece, it’s inspired my whole belief system at this point.” You nod and play along, immediately getting the plan. He was so soft when he wanted to.

“Ah right, so you’ve used the strategies in battle then as well?”

“Of course, it’s come in handy so many times-“

“Ah! There he is! We were looking for you, my boy.” Phil smiles when he spots the two of you. Wilbur already has a clenched jaw and you try to console his mood with a smile of your own.

It’s weird to watch but he seems to practically let all of his rage go. You see the soft puppy eyes you met him with. It’s a sudden change and you can’t help but feel a pang in your heart. If it weren’t for you and Schlatt this is the man that would have proposed. Would you have reacted differently?

“Heh? Er, I was just findin someone more interesting to talk with than you two geezers'' you chuckle at technos taunt and cover your mouth. Wilbur and Phil chuckle as well and you smile, surprised to see the still good mood.

“I’d agree that my doe is by far the most interesting person here. But I’m afraid I’d have to steal them. If that’s alright with you both? I’ve not been a very attentive fiancé as of late.” He offers his hand and you immediately move to take it, being pulled to stand next to him.

“Well I don’t mind, I’ve taken enough of your time.” Phil pats your shoulder.

“Meh, I’ll find something else to entertain me. Phil, what do you say to some good ol fashioned sparring-“ they both start off in a new direction, leaving you with Wil. Techno looks back with something close to an apology, but you understand. He did everything he could.

It’s quiet again and you find yourself leaning against Wilbur, the exhaustion now seeping into your bones. He lets you do so without a fight or a firm hold on you, just gently letting his arms cradle you.

“My dear, you shouldn’t wear yourself out like this… where you expecting to just fall into bed tonight?” The smile on his face is expressed in his tone and you nod slowly. You can’t help but fear his response but he only laughs.

“You aren’t upset?”

“No, I could never be upset with you. Why would you think such a thing?” The words differ greatly from the still stinging wounds but you shrug. 

“No, you know why you think that. Come on my darling, please share with me. I'd hate to see you think ill of me.” You sigh and move to lean against the wall and surprisingly he lets you.

“It’s just that- with how you’ve been acting lately… and how you get when you’re upset…” 

“What? What are you talking about doe?” It hits you like a slap to the face. Did he really not know? Was he really that oblivious to the pain you were in?

You pull on the collar of your outfit and he sputters, suddenly seeming nervous.

“MY DEAR! Goodness! Shouldn’t we wait until back in the rooms for such things as bare shoulders?” It makes you flush and tug your clothes tighter to you. 

Maybe he was right. Maybe you were acting rashly, but you would still show him once you were alone. Maybe it would explain some things to him.

———————

The door closes and your mind is still spinning, you barely register sitting down, almost in Wilbur’s lap. He’s looking at you with so much concern that it seems impossible he’s the same man who only a few days prior had given you the marks.

“Love, please, you can show me now. I just wanted to protect your innocence, don’t now hide it from me.” His hands brush over your shoulder and you raise your hand to pull at the collar again.

You show him the marks he left, raised red scratches and yellowy green bruises. He sucks in a breath and pulls his hands away. For a moment you think he’s going to apologize, to help you tend to the wounds again, but he doesn’t. 

He looks at you sadly, his eyes meeting yours. You can’t help but let tears well up at the confusion that surrounds you.

“Doe… he did that to you, not me. I know you don’t want to think that but-“

“Wait what? Who? I swear it was you-“ your breathing speeds up and you can’t stop it despite the ache it causes in your ribs.

“I can promise it’s not. Schlatt did so many awful things to you on the ship, do you not remember? You spent days crying about it…” that’s not true… Why was he? This was too much. The tears start to pour down your face and he frowns, pulling you close in a tender hug.

“It’s not, he loves me… why would he do that?” You whimper softly, trying to focus on what you do know, “J didnt-“

“He did. You just don’t remember because you’re such a good person. You don’t want to think bad of anyone…” His words are comforting in the wrong way. You wished he would tell you what you wanted to hear, not all this- all this confusion.

“But you did it-“

“No love, I would never hurt you. Ever. You need to stop thinking that way. Would a man who would hurt you ever care so deeply for you?” 

You didn’t want to believe him, but the words seemed so genuine, you couldn’t see past the pure silvery tone and sweet soft eyes.

“N-no… but-“

“Hush, doe. It’s alright. We don’t have to think on it anymore. You’re already stressed enough as is..” he presses a soft kiss to your temple and starts to stand. In your haze of confusion and desperation you cling to his jacket and let out a soft whine.

“Doe? I thought you were tired, I was going to let you be. Sleep is good for stress.” The care in his voice makes you want to melt and you close your eyes. 

You didn’t want to be alone with this. You couldn’t be alone with all these thoughts in your head and be expected to sleep. So you look up at him. And you speak.

“Please...stay.. I don’t- Wilbur I need you…” when your gaze so quickly falls to the floor you miss his wicked grin before his hand moves to cup your cheek and raise your gaze back to his now softly smiling face.

“Of course, anything for you my doe.”

You end up curled up in his arms, sniffling and burying your face in his chest so you don’t have the space to think. For some reason you find sleep so much quicker than normal, and you can’t help but want to thank Wilbur for it. Surely he was the cause.

Surely his words weren’t meant to upset you like this. He just wanted you to be safe. To be cared for.

Was all your memory wrong then? Was he truly safe? Was Schlatt ever your easy love?


	20. Is There Hope?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So I have to clarify, the person I call my wife is my platonic wife. Sorry! We have a running joke about our Minecraft wedding, if you guys want the photos I might be willing to share sometime! 
> 
> For now, have more pain

It’s still dark when you wake up, eyes needing time to adjust. You feel warmer than you have in a long while and as you start to turn to find some cool space in the bed you remember. His arms are still wrapped around you.

Wilbur. He had stayed when you asked him, even when he’d wanted to leave. He had to have been telling the truth then. The soft embrace fills you with a shaky happy feeling. It feels perfect and wrong at the same time.

The person holding you was the wrong one, right? Or was he the right one? Was he just protecting you this whole time. You couldn’t think past this, your thoughts tangled and tied in knots. The sniffles start back up and Wil stirs, waking with a soft smile. He presses a kiss to your forehead and wipes away those tears.

“Good morning little one, it’s okay. I’m right here”

And you don’t remember why those words ache.

————————

The ship is still docked. It hasn't moved in over a week now. Alex and Connor were doing all they could to get it perfect to sail again, trying to convince Schlatt that they should run before anyone came after them again. 

It never worked. Everytime he set foot on the ship it set him back another three steps. Since losing you he’d done nothing but rage and yell in public and drown himself in drink when in private. 

The deck of the ship was still scuffed from your dancing. The ropes were made of your hard work. The kitchens still had the remnants of the last thing you’d prepped. His fucking bed still smelled like you…

Alex was tired of it. He’d threatened to toss everything that reminded them of you. He couldn’t handle the loss, and couldn’t bear to see schlatt so done with life.

Connor tried to stay positive, but even he shed a few tears, not that he would admit it, when he found himself talking to no one while fixing the hull. 

None of them were doing well, but none of them would talk about it. It was better to grieve silently and move on than to wallow was the ongoing theme.

It’s another bad day when schlatt finds a scrap of paper with their handwriting scrawled across it. Just a few words about rope making and he was in pain again. Alex busts in talking about how it’s a perfect day to set off again and sees Schlatt slumped over in his seat. Connor is right behind and all three just sigh in acceptance.

They couldn’t seem to move on. And it was going to be the end of them.

They were all just about to accept that fate when there’s a heavy footfall from the deck. A familiar teasing laugh about how shit the ship was and the crew suddenly has a spark.

Maybe there was hope to move on after all.

———————

It’s much later in the day and you haven’t left Wilbur’s side. You almost feel desperate for this side of him. The one that makes you laugh and spins you around in the halls. He even sings for you, it’s a picture perfect moment.

You even sit at his side now, reading a book he’d handed to you before diving into his own. The library is quiet and at first you enjoy it. 

Then you become ansty. The quiet seems to crawl up the walls and muffle your comfort with conflicting thoughts.

Dancing with J turns into walking with Wilbur when you think of happiness and as you try to grasp at the old memory it starts to crumble.

Rage in Wil’s eyes fades to the pain in J’s when he hurt you. He hurt you…

You itch everywhere and can’t help but bolt to you feet to pace.

“Doe, come back and sit. You’ll get yourself worked up again.” Comes his voice, bored and nonchalant.

“Wil- I can’t focus, can we go somewhere else please?”

“In a minute. I have to go over this again. Just sit down and be good for me for now.” The bluntness shocks you and you stare at him for a moment before following his order- his request…

The thoughts crawl back in and you start to silently cry, not wanting to be alone, but needing something other than silence and stillness. It’s beating wrong thoughts into your brain and you want to tear out the replacements with their old comforting ideas.

A crash comes from the doorway and you whip around to look. Tommy and Tubbo smile sheepishly from their pile on the floor and techno chuckles from just outside. You want to stand and join the chaos but a hand on your arm stops you.

“We were looking for you! Your room was empty!” Tommy whines and stands, helping Tubbo. You smile and lower your eyes. Wilbur’s hand on your arm sends a jolt of fear through you. You can’t even fight it to speak, but at least the chaos chased away the panic.

“Wilbur, can we borrow them for some fun?” Tubbo is now hidden behind Tommy and techno is frowning at your current position. You’d been doing so well… even you are disappointed.

“I’m not sure they want to-“

“I do Wil, please?” He huffs at your interruption and you lower your head again.

“I thought you wanted to spend the day with me for once.” You nod slowly.

“Well yes, but you’re busy now and I haven’t even said hello to them today… just for a little bit?”

“You heard them Wilbur,” techno grumbles, “come on. We’re going on a hike.” You smile again and stand, almost pulled back down when Wilbur takes your hand.

He looks you in the eye and squeezes your hand. The smile doesn’t meet his eyes but he kisses your hand softly, another show of affection.

“Just stay safe my love. Be back before dark or I’ll get worried.” With your mind addled as it is you don’t recognize the line as similar to his recent rule you had disobeyed. You just smile and nod, causing all three of your friends to exchange worried looks.

He pulls you in and kisses your cheek far too close to your lips for it to be anything but purposeful. You blink at him in shock, but he lets you go. You stumble over to the boys, Tommy and Tubbo each taking an arm.

It was worrying how quickly you’d changed, and they were determined to check in on you. This wasn’t a good mood for you to be in, and they all hated it.

———————

As soon as all four of you are outside Tommy takes you by the shoulder and looks you dead in the eyes. Tubbo won’t let go of your hand but he’s looking to Tommy for instruction and you feel overwhelmed by the sudden attention.

“Are you alright? You were crying when we walked in.” Tommy’s normal bubbly personality is toned down with the worry in his voice.

“Yeah, we were worried. Did he say anything?” Tubbo speaks up, following his friend's lead.

“I’m fine, I just got overwhelmed- he didn’t say anything really..”

“That doesn’t make it better.” Comes Technos voice. He didn’t sound concerned, he sounded angry.

“Then why were you crying?” Asks Tubbo softly.

“My thoughts were hazy and I was having trouble thinking. It just upset me and Wil didn’t want me to leave so I couldn't clear my head.” Techno and Tommy both scoff in unison and you chuckle nervously.

“What did he do to you? You seem so… different compared to yesterday?”

You don’t want to answer Tommy’s question. It’s hard to think about and you don’t even really know the answer. You just start shaking softly and it’s enough for Techno to have you sit and try to breath for a moment before answering.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to know. I think I know what he’s doing.” Techno leaves Tubbo to sit next to you and stands up with a grunt, “and he’s a bastard for doing it.”

“Wh- What’s he doing?” Tommy hops up and tries to get Techno to share, his hero complex at the forefront.

“He wants a compliant spouse. He’s manipulative and confusing them to do so.”

“Why does he even want to get married so bad? It’s such a weird thing,” Tubbo pipes up, Tommy nodding in agreement.

“Yeah! He keeps moving the wedding up too!”

“He said it’s cause he loves me so much…” you mumble, trying to excuse Wil’s actions, but you don’t know if it’s more for them or for you.

“He needs to get married so he can have Phil’s title. I tried to tell you, but he wouldn’t let me.”

“Title? But I thought that was yours?”

“It is. But we made a deal. Because Wil was begging for a chance to be the heir.” Techno sighs and kneels down in front of you once more.

“He needs you to get power.”

“But- but he said…” it’s too much and you want to sob once more. Too many conflicting stories in your own head and you feel desperate to choose the right one. 

With all the stress you can’t seem to find it and you want to scream.

What was the truth...


	21. A Change of Pace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m extending the cliffhanger with a different POV chapter! Enjoyyyyy

The sea was covered in storms. The exact opposite of the type of weather you’d want to sail in, even less so on a five man boat with only three people willing to work. 

Which was exactly what Schlatt was doing. It’s not like his crew was putting up a fight, they were just glad to be on the ocean again. Well, there was one person complaining.

“COULDN'T YOU HAVE WAITED A FEW DAYS! COME ON!” Dream yells from his spot, clinging to the rail of the boat. Despite being a capable pair of hands to help he was refusing to do more than supply information and materials. Something about diplomatic rules. Schlatt couldn’t give less of a shit.

“You’re the one who took too long with the letter asshole!” Alex brushes past him at high speed to take care of a loose rope.

“I didn’t take that long-“

“Bitches who don’t help don’t get to speak!” Connor cuts in and Dream groans. 

It was going to be a long trip, but there was no way they’d stop now. They had hope. Schlatt clutches tight to a letter. It wasn’t even addressed to him, it was for Dream.

It was from Techno. Similar to the letter he’d gotten from the man before taking off with his little one. It made him burn hotter than anything had before. 

“Dream,  
So I know L’manburg already owes you a favor, but I have an addendum I’d like to add. The man you were tasked to track down is no longer an enemy in my books.   
In fact, I need you to find him again. The person considered to be his hostage needs to be ‘taken away’ again. Wilbur has become unstable and I’m afraid we aren’t able to control his actions.  
Consider this me owing you a personal favor.  
Technoblade”

It wasn’t anything concrete but it was enough proof of Wilbur’s mistreatment of his favorite person that Schlatt was ready to kill the bitch. Unstable my ass, this man was a slimy manipulative asshole since birth, and J should know. He was the one who’d run him out of L’manburg and then chased him away from you.

He couldn’t care less about how dangerous the waters were, he just needed to get to you. It was insane how desperate he got to save you once your happiness was just slightly less secure. And with Techno on their side, who knows what they could accomplish.

For now Schlatt covers his true emotions in rage. No one needs to see those except him. It would be weak and he couldn’t be weak now, you were in danger. That he put you in…

He was at fault. 

Did he even deserve you?

———————

Hours later he’s being tugged away from the wheel and his other work. He hadn’t taken a break since they’d set off and even Dream was worried, though he only showed it by complaining about veering off course. He didn’t want to, the longer he spent not working the more time he had to think, and he didn’t want to think.

Every time he had taken a second away from work was time he spent drowning in thoughts of you. Stuck in happy memories, or neck deep in thoughts of how much pain you might be in without him there to protect you. 

This is why he didn’t like to think.

He was already tearing up and he hadn’t even gotten down to his bunk. Shit. Alex was gonna tell Connor and they’d get all mushy and pity him. Schlatt didn’t need or want pity. It was for losers.

Maybe he should be pitied…

Fuck no.

He wipes away what has escaped and bites his tongue to suck it up. It’s good he did at that moment because it’s the exact moment Alex looks back to ask him a question. Of course he missed what it was, but that doesn’t matter.

“-ou okay schlatt?” Shit, he already looks concerned. If he didn’t shut him up this would turn for the soft.

“M’fine. Mind your own business fucker.” It came out weaker than intended and Alex doesn’t even laugh. He wants to punch something but even he can feel the fatigue. 

He doesn’t fight it when Alex, despite being shorter than him, wraps an arm around him and supports him down the stairs. He doesn’t fight when he’s led to the dining table instead of his bunk. And he wants to, but he doesn’t throw the lukewarm drink pressed into his hands.

He can’t stand to look up at Alex when he sits across from the other, preferring the silence. He doesn’t look up when Alex clears his voice, or when the door opens and is quickly shut again when Alex starts to go off on the poor fool who tried to enter.

It would normally put a smile on his face to be in this room with one of his crew, talking and laughing and playing card games. All it does now is remind him how quiet it’s become since he let you go. 

“J.. please say something? I don’t like you so sullen.” Alex pauses, “you look awful,” it’s too genuine to lighten the mood like he intends. 

Schlatt still chuckles, but it gets caught in his throat and the shaking of his shoulders is no longer from laughter. From the outside it hurts to watch so Alex can’t imagine how it feels to be the person the hurt is coming from.

“Jason…”

“I can’t- I just…” Schlatt’s voice sounds so broken, it’s warped and hoarse and it’s the weakest he’s sounded in years. 

“I’m here, I’m listening.” Alex in turn lets go of the jokes and the teasing, ready to support the man who had supported him for so long.

“I hurt them, they should hate me for hurting them and then letting them go to get hurt even more. I hate me for it..” it’s painful to admit and painful to hear. Both men are teary eyed and clutching at what composure they still have.

“You were trying to do the right thing-“

“AND LOOK WHERE THAT GOT ME! ….I’m sorry, it’s just awful to think that I’m the reason they’re in so much pain..”

“You don’t know that..”

“But it’s what I know Wilbur would do. If they can’t control him it means he’s breaking them slowly and that’s almost worse. They trust too much and that means they won’t realize until too late…”

It’s silent, Alex doesn’t have a comeback for that one. There’s no way to deny that’s what he could be doing. With how insane he’d been at port, there’s no telling what he’s capable of.

It’s quiet enough to hear the broken sobs coming from Jason as he tries to hold them back. He doesn’t want to let them out, it’s not useful to cry, he should be back on deck helping, doing something to get to his… not partner, lover didn’t feel right either, it wasn't even like they were his, he was theirs.

He was always theirs.

Fuck.

“Why did I have to fall so hard Alex.. it was so easy too. They just made it too easy. I wasn’t planning on staying, I was planning on getting the deal and getting out. Then they had to blush like that and tease me. Fuck, I fell so quick.” He laughs through the tears now running down his face.

“I was scared they didn’t feel that way back. Me! I was scared. Because they felt just the right amount of perfect that they shouldn’t fall for a fuck up like me. I should’ve let them go before they realized. Maybe then they would actually feel something for that bastard and would have a good life.” The laughter is forced now and Alex puts his hand on Schlatt’s shoulder. 

The laughter dies away, back to tears and hoarse voice. They can both hear someone shuffling at the door, they didn’t have much more time before someone came in and someone would snap.

“Fuck, I don’t think I can ever give them up. I’m desperate to see them again. To hold them. I feel empty… I don’t think I’ve felt like this ever.”

“It’s okay man. You… you deserve to be happy like they make you. I’ve seen it. They make us all happier.” Alex smiles, a few tears falling down his face, “let’s get them back, but after you get some rest. You honestly look like shit and I’m not letting you back on deck until you rest.”

They both let the silence sit, much better than the last time. It takes a while but Schlatt stands and walks off to his bunk. With all that out on the table it was easier to just relax. He didn’t feel the need to spiral down in those thoughts. 

He just closes his eyes and lets himself remember when you were still in his arms. You’ll be back soon, but until then he’ll let himself miss it.

The quiet is peaceful once again, and the storms calm. Something was trying to help their goals, and it was a welcome change.


	22. It’s time for a change.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whoop, all my motivation went out the door with the second week of school. Uploads are gonna slow, but! We are getting close to the end of the fic!

You can’t help but stare blankly up at Techno. Everything he said made sense in some way but it went completely against what Wilbur was constantly telling you. You raise your hand to your shoulder and frown, biting the inside of your cheek and debating whether to ask the question on your mind.

Techno doesn’t give you the chance to speak up  
just yet. His own hands clench and unclench at his sides, most likely uncomfortable with the emotional conversation.

“You need to admit it to yourself again. He doesn’t care about you, and you knew this two days ago. You don’t love him either…” 

“Techno! You can’t just say that” tubbo pipes up from where you’d forgotten him and Tommy still were standing. “It has to be rough, I’m sorry these idiots are like this.” He offers a warm smile and it makes it a touch easier to relax past the blood rushing through your ears.

“I know, but they need to get over it. It’s going to hurt everyone in the long run-“

“Hush.”

You chuckle softly at Tubbo’s sudden bravery and find yourself a bit more grounded. The kindness didn’t make you want to drift off like wilburs did, and it was much nicer than the blunt statements from Techno.

It was so easy to fall back into that hazy state of chaos but the fact that they seemed to care about you made you fight to stay. You blink up at all three and take a breath. It’s hard to think through the sludge left by panic, but you manage.

“I’m sorry… he just took the time to explain some things. He seemed so genuine and sweet that I couldn’t help but feel like it had to be true.”

“What did he tell you?” Tommy cuts in. You pull the shoulder of your top down to reveal the gashes on your shoulder. Tommy had never helped you with those wounds, only rebandaging the now mostly healed sword cut. They’re not as ugly as they could have been with Tubbos salve and you taking care of them.

“He told me these were from before you saved me. That the reason they still hurt is because I wouldn’t let him take care of them… that I wasn’t ready to let go of him.” Tears slip down your face and all three frown at you.

“...you didn’t have those when you showed up. The only one you had was from the accident.” Techno grits his teeth.

“But he said-“

“Let’s not talk about him, okay? Let’s just get through how you’re feeling.” Tubbo smiles and offers a hand for you to grab. You do and almost immediately Techno stands and starts to pace. 

“Okay… I’m feeling confused. I’m not confident on anything anymore, not even who I can trust…” Tubbo nods and Tommy pulls a face.

“You can still trust me though right?” You smile and nod, Tubbo chuckles quietly.

“He’s a bit clingy-“

“AM NOT!”

“Be quiet, the mature people are talking.”

“I don’t see Techno over here!”

You giggle at their antics. Of course you could trust them both. All three really. 

And they really were going to try to prove it to you. That they were there to help and that you could trust them. And yourself.

———————

Tommy is always pulling you away from Wilbur with a rushed half assed apology and a cackle.

He is there to talk to about anything, making stupid jokes about how boring everyone else was. He also kept you moving. Whenever you felt stuck in glue and like you wanted to just sit and melt away suddenly he was there, by your side and pulling you along to go run around the green with sticks as swords.

He kept a smile on your face in the darkest moments. He was always there to push and pull you to a happier moment, your sun behind the clouds. 

Tubbo always has a spare handkerchief and a kind word to keep you from falling back into that compliance. 

He lets you cry about not knowing what things were, letting you talk through the confusion about why things Wilbur did hurt. He has a solid shoulder to lean on and just sit and feel. He won’t stop you from hurting, but he won’t let you be alone when you are. It keeps the loneliness at bay when it’s all there is anymore.

His kindness keeps you stable and keeps you on track. He is the moon shining over the sea keeping you from crashing into the rocks and drowning in your own confusion and pain.

Techno isn’t quite so good at distraction or comfort, but he wants to help in the way he can. He gives you the tools to fight when you can. It might be the most important thing.

He teaches you how to breathe through the panicked moments, counting them to drown out the voices that lie and poke at you. He tells you that violence may be the most universal language, but it isn’t one you can use with yourself. That you have to trust yourself more than anyone else, because you know what you’ve experienced and what you can handle. 

He helps you the most honestly, helping you to rely on yourself when no one else can be there. It’s important, because you all know that Wilbur isn’t one to share you. 

These skills and all their support keeps you afloat just when you think you were about to sink. You are so so grateful, but you still have to deal with your own issues.

———————

Your own issues involved still not being able to stand up to Wilbur. He could say two words and you’d be back in his palm. You wanted so badly to keep him happy despite knowing the truth. It wasn’t like you really had a true choice, right? Schlatt wasn’t coming back, and you didn’t have a reason to back out really. Not one that would end up without hurting someone.

It was going well enough tonight, your silent reading next to Wilbur keeping him appeased after a few days of low contact. While the low contact was good for you mentally, it wasn’t good for Wilbur’s mood usually, so you wanted to try and keep him content.

You peek up from your book with a nervous smile. He seemed relaxed enough that maybe you could convince him to let you join the boys after dinner instead of joining him once again. 

“Wilbur dear…”

“Yes little one?” You refrain from wincing at that. It still hurt hearing that, but you couldn’t react in front of him. He didn’t need to know you weren’t as swayed as he thought.

“I was thinking about tonight-“

“Yes, I’ve planned for the seamstress to get your measurements for your wedding clothes. Don’t worry about it.” Right. Wedding planning.

“That’s not what I meant…. but thank you for that. Maybe afterwards I could meet Tommy for a stroll?-“

“No. I need you to sleep well tonight.” It’s blunt but he quickly covers it with a smile, “I can’t have my doe in a state for your first time attending the planning meetings.”

“I was hoping you would excuse me from that-“

“Again? Do you just not care about the wedding? I should talk to Phil about keeping Tommy and Techno away for a while…”

“Please no! I just- I just want to see them again soon. I’m sorry.” You can feel the spiral starting, and you cling to techno’s advice. In one, out two, in three…

Just as Wilbur is about to speak again the door opens. Techno stands in the frame with a bored expression.

“Hey, Tommy is asking after- oh Wil. You’re here.” You smile, happy to see someone you knew to trust. Wil was not so enthused.

“Yes. We’re busy, so if you would just-“

“They don’t look very busy, and why don’t you let them speak for themselves, hmm?” 

“They don’t need to, I’m here for them and I know what my fiancé wants.” 

Focus on breathing, it was easier with the book to squeeze in rhythm. And now Techno was looking to you, a brow raised in concern. You smile and stand.

“I’d like to go with Techno, Wilbur. Since I will be so busy.” It’s hard to say, but it causes a rush of relief to do so. You take a few steps and he grabs your wrist.

“But you should stay, my love. For me?” He plays up the charm but with a quick glance to Techno, who seemed to be smiling proudly at seeing you fight, you shake your hand and pull away.

This doesn’t go over well.

“Wh- What is so very fu- so very important that you can’t stay with me? Hmm? Is it Techno? Does he love you like I do?” The guilt starts trying to worm its way in when he stares you down.

It’s quick to overwhelm, but you bite your cheek and breath for a moment. ‘He doesn’t love you’ the words echo softly and you steel yourself. A warm hand on your shoulder makes it even easier, once Techno steps forward to support you.

“You’re overreacting Wilbur.”

“No! I’m not! I want you to stay!”

“If you want me to stay, then I think it’s time we talked about some things. On my terms.”

Things were about to go some sort of way, but boy were you ready for it. The confidence the boys had built in you was boiling over and you were ready for some change. Some explanation. And some fucking truth from Wilbur.


	23. The actual confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter, sorry, but this is where the chapter needed to end.

The silence from Wilbur was heavy. He wouldn’t even open his mouth, just staring at you with a dead cold stare. You almost back down but Techno’s hand on your shoulder gives you a strange amount of bravery and instead you just lift your chin and wait.

You needed to be in charge of this moment. If he got you responding to him it would go in a way that wouldn’t help. It was easy to see he wasn’t going to back down so quickly, but neither would you. You had yourself to look out for, and if you were going to be stuck in this situation you would be the one to control it.

“...fine. What can I do for you, my precious doe.” He leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. His smile didn’t meet his eyes but you ignore it.

“You can listen. I think you’ve been telling me some things that aren’t exactly true. I can’t see myself getting married anytime soon if I stay so confused.” The whole plan was to hold the wedding over his head. He couldn’t fight on that. 

Techno chuckles and drops his hand. From his perspective you had this handled and he couldn’t be prouder. He moves to lean against the doorframe, still in sight of both of you.

“Wha- who? Who told you those things little one? What would I lie about?” 

“The wounds. They aren’t from Schl-“

“I told you not to mention him.”

“I don’t care. The only scratch inflicted on me by Schlatt was in an accident. Tommy witnessed it, and I have memories of you being not so kind.”

“I told you-“

“I know what you said. I’m trusting my original memories more than anything else.” You falter when he frowns, knuckles turning white. “Not that I don’t trust you Wil, I’m marrying you after all, my head is just too fuzzy to accept new information as true.”

He sighs and rubs his temple, growing increasingly tired of having to hold back with Techno in the room.

“Darling, can’t we talk about this later? Maybe over your fitting?” You open and shut your mouth, struggling to come up with a response. That seemed rather reasonable, right?

“That might be ok-“

“They said now, and you’re the one who said you would listen. Now follow through.” Techno doesn’t even look over but you sigh in relief.

“Right. Wilbur, I need you to tell me the truth. The whole truth. I know you need me to marry you. There’s no use hiding it-“

“Fuck off, he told you then…” he folds his hands in his lap and juts his chin at Techno.

“He did.”

“Then why haven’t you left?”

“Because I want to believe you actually love me. Or did at some point, or will in the future. Because I can’t find a way to leave this engagement gracefully and I don’t want to hurt anyone. Not even you.” You notice his lip quirk up into a second long smile. 

“I see… so you’ll still marry me then?”

“In the spring. Original date, no more trying to pull it forward.”

“And there won’t be another escape- kidnapping attempt then?”

“Not if you behave and treat me well.”

Silence fills the room again. It was a good deal, for everyone honestly. Even if no one wanted him to be duke, they can admit, you being his partner will keep the majority of the chaos at bay. You would make Wilbur happy, and in turn he would keep from hurting anyone again. Simple. 

Too bad he was still looking for something to sweeten the pot.

“What else do I get in this deal? I’m assuming my kind treatment has to extend to your hoard of friends that you’ve made out of my brothers?”

“Wh- well, yes, but what more could you want?” Even techno is a bit confused. He’d been the one to help you plan this after all.

“Just because you’re my fiancé, doesn’t guarantee you’ll play the part well. I still want control over how you act at public gatherings.” He grins and you frown.

“I’m not sure I like that idea so much…” you mumble and techno scoffs, suddenly back into the conversation now that it had breached uncharted waters.

“I’ve seen the bruising, you think you can ‘control’ without causing damage?” It’s a thinly veiled threat, most definitely. It meant Techno would keep up check-ins to force Wilbur to keep his end of the bargain.

“Shut up! You don’t know shit!” It’s like he’s spitting acid with how far back you jump and he sighs. He forces his face back into the mask of kindness and smiles apologetic to you, “I’m sorry love, wasn’t aimed at you.”

“Yeah, it was aimed at me. I should know. Your spit landed on my shoes.” You choke back a laugh at that but can’t fight the smile. This almost felt normal.

That was good. Normal was what this needed to be. No one was coming for you. This was your life. It was whatever you could make of it, so you keep up your smile and let yourself enjoy the moment.

“-don me mister, I’m the oldest sibling so I can be big and scary~” the teasing is lame, and doesn’t pack the punch it needs to when you zone back in. 

“Alright. Enough of that, boys. I only have one more question before I leave Wilbur.” He turns to you, the scowl still on his face, “why me.”

“That’s- actually a good question, little one. Didn’t expect that from you. Techno, maybe. Never from you.”

“Don’t be rude.”

“Sorry. There are a few reasons. One of the biggest is your land. Rich in resources, low in insurrection. Then there was your parents, eager to marry you off, but I did have to convince them I was the better option. And then you. So trusting and such a bleeding heart. Honestly, when you yelled at me over that hunt, I wanted you then and there.” The way he speaks is so cold and calculating, until the last lines…

It was so… genuine and could be sweet if it weren’t for the way his eyes glassed over and he stared at you. It felt hungry, possessive.

“So you just wanted an advantageous match and I fit the criteria.”

“I mean, yes, but your looks are quite the bonus.” You scoff and turn to the door. You had heard enough.

He was far too much, the sickly sweet gone and replaced with his true intentions. Control. Possession. Want. It made you want to gag. 

He just sits and watches you leave, not even standing to say goodbye. Techno holds the door and nods to you. You had done well in his books, the way you held yourself the whole time was very strong. He could be proud to call you his in law soon enough. But he didn’t really want that to happen.

———————

You collapse into his arms just a few yards down the hall. Tears stream down your face. Relief. Panic. Fear. Everything welled up so quickly as soon as you let the walls down that it bubbled over. He grunts when you do, but holds you up. 

Why couldn’t Tubbo just appear when you needed the kid.

“Thank you…” is all you manage, but he pats your head and shrugs. 

“No problem kid. It’s the least I can do, since you watch the gremlin for me more often than not.” You laugh through the tears and pull back after a long moment.

“We did it. He agreed. He admitted to a few things even.”

“You did it. I just stood there like a bag of rocks. Doesn’t matter anyway. Wilbur’s a coward who would’ve bent the first time you pushed a bit too hard.” He ruffles your hair and nudges your shoulder. “Besides. The kid actually was asking for you. He’ll probably come and find us if we don’t start that way soon.”

It’s a good distraction. You’d done enough for the day, and you still had wedding planning. 

You weren’t looking forward to the spring...


	24. Letting go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really do be laying the angst on thick. We are coming up upon the ending soon! So Schlatt will return, I’ve made a promise of a happy ending to multiple people.

After all that fuss you’d put on, you can’t just step back and let Wilbur run the whole of the wedding. You had to put your foot down and assert your opinions to keep any semblance of control on the situation. It was hard enough to get him to stop talking long enough for you to get a word in, you didn’t want to give him another inch.

This had caused a sudden lack of time to spend with the boys. It wasn’t too hard in the beginning, but you were starting to feel bitter. You barely had a moment to yourself before Wil would come and drag you to another meeting. It’s all you wanted to just sit in the sun or touch the grass but you were trapped again. This time in a cage of your own making.

Perhaps it was part of his plan. He would make you so miserable that you would relinquish control once again just so you could crawl back to those peaceful days spending time with your boys. It would make sense if he didn’t seem so perfectly miserable as well.

He seemed like he would honestly prefer you to step down and let him have the reins again. His affection had dwindled on the days when you spent the most time together. To your benefit, he rarely attempted a kiss, but you couldn’t avoid it forever. He was still just as possessive. 

Even if you didn’t see anyone much, just the mention of Techno around you set Wilbur on edge. He would immediately shower you in public acts of affection. His arm was around your waist for shoulders and he was glued to your side. Honestly you started to not mind it so much. He was close to the only physical affection you received anymore.

It was sad. You wanted more than anything to go out and tackle Tommy to the ground. Curl up with Tubbo under a tree and read him a book. Nudge shoulders with Techno as you walked next to each other and talked. You ached for the simple things. 

Things you couldn’t have anymore too.

The way Alex would smile and then immediately try to push you over. The simple brushing of hands when you and Connor worked together. Almost every single moment you spent with Schlatt was burned into your skin. It was hard to remember when Wilbur was there to burn over it, but you still felt it.

The way he cradled you. His hands on your face. His arm pressed against your shoulder as you faded into sleep. You ached deep in your heart for his touch to return, but you know that you can’t have it. Even if he did come back you couldn’t stand to see him or his crew hurt because you decided to be selfish. 

So you tuck that ache deep inside and hidden away and pretend you only ache for the kindness shown to you here in L’manburg.

———————

Time flies so quickly in the planning stages. The snow had started to melt away into the surrounding waters. It hurt to see the season changing from the windows as you planned.

The first time was looking toward the unfrosted window, the condensation distracting you enough that your arms drooped and you were pulled back into the stiff position. The seamstress was getting tired of your impatience and fidgeting. It’s a soft chuckle from the side that pulls your eyes.

Wilbur was there too. He wanted to watch the fitting and was being entertained by someone else pushing you around for once. It’s embarrassing to be watched but you can’t look away, stuck in the same place for so long. The pins and needles all along your torso were doing most of the work to keep you still now, but his eyes kept the rest frozen.

Hours and hours of this over time. It’s what has kept you from noticing the weather warming. And you weren’t near enough to windows during planning meetings.

The planning meetings were boring. You were only consulted on colors, or flowers, or what diadem you should wear. It was honestly insulting. And you grew tired of answering the same questions over and over again.

“May I look over the guest list?” You pipe up one day.

“-and I think, what? You want to do what?” Wilbur looks at you with shock.

“I want to invite a few people. Is that not allowed? For me to invite people to my own wedding?”

“I just thought that decorations would be enough for you to handle.”

“I want to do more. I’ve already dealt with enough color schemes that I may have gone color blind.” He chuckles despite himself and shakes his head.

“Who do you want to invite, my love?”

“If it would please you, I’d like to invite Lady Niki. She is an old friend.” He laughs and nods, finding it ridiculous for you to make such a fuss.

“Of course. I thought you would say something stupid.” Once again you’re brushed off and immediately pulled back to design choices.

It’s like you didn’t matter. Nothing you tried even affected him for more than a moment. The thoughts cloud your head and you start to drift as you are once more bombarded with questions.

The only thing to catch your eye is a tuft of black hair tucked under a hat. You perk up and search the surrounding area for another glimpse… could it have been Alex? 

No. It was just another nobleman wanting your attention. You sink back down and your heart sinks with you. It was too much to even hope for that. You were starting to go mad.

The weeks tucked away inside make the first sight of the thawing ground of the wedding venue a shock. You had seen the soft thaw, but this made it all the more real. 

The ground didn’t crack with each step. Flowers pushed at the damp soil. Even the grey skies were fading to a pale blue. Time was creeping up on you.

You are tucked into Wilbur’s arm, ‘keeping the chill away’ when really it was just letting it creep further in. The hustle and bustle of prep did nothing to warm you and you honestly wished the weather would go back to reflecting that. You needed the cold to match your heart so it didn’t feel so frozen and fragile and stark against the new spring warmth. 

Wil pays so little attention to you that you slip away, mumbling something about wanting to go look at the view. He was pleased enough by it that he didn’t even follow.

The still slightly cold air blows past you as you look out to the sea. You still remember her kindly, even if the winter would turn most to hatred. You hoped Wilbur would let you go on a trip after the wedding… it would be so nice to be out again. Even with the chain around your finger, if you could at least have the sea and it’s memories you might survive the ice that had built up around your heart.

It’s so easy to lean into the wind and close your eyes. It felt like a kind embrace from an old friend and you wanted to soak it in. Your boys could only do so much to melt the ice. You had to take a few steps yourself. Those steps would start with finding the good moments and clinging.

You don’t notice how close you come to tipping over. You’re lost in your own world and letting the breeze guide you. Of course when you stumble it tears you away, but not so much as the yell from the crowd of workers.

You whip around to find it. It sounded like…. Connor wasn’t here either. One would think you’d gone mad, but you’d heard him yell to step back. You have to shake it off and only barely manage when Wilbur rushes to your side and you are back in his grasp.

“You had me scared little one.” The ice curls back in and you once again wish for the thaw to go away.

It doesn’t. 

The days continue to warm, but now you spend your time practicing dance. Finally you could laugh with Tommy as he threatened to just have you stand on his feet. You could relax when Techno led you around the floor, no worries of sudden questions. You both prefer the silent camaraderie. 

Dancing was mostly to practice with Wilbur. His grip was still a bit tight, but you could hardly blame him. The last time you had danced together you’d ended up jumping off a balcony. 

The balcony in question had been since locked and you weren’t allowed to dance with Techno near any open windows, one of Wilbur’s requests. You understand his worry, the idea sparking a bit of hope in yourself, but you no longer even feel like fighting against the walls that keep you.

It just made it harder. 

You had seen glimpses of your friends whenever you felt a sliver of that hope. Every time your hope was dashed when you realized it was nothing more than a hallucination. You just wanted it so much that it was making you see things.

So you let go. 

You no longer crane your neck to check for the realness of these moments, rather brushing them off and not letting the hope fester. It wasn’t even Wilbur who stomped out the embers now. You did it willingly. 

You wanted easy, so you would make it yourself.


	25. It’s Tomorrow.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! This and then two more chapters and this fic can be put to rest! I hope you all enjoy this very very delayed update

It was here. 

The wedding was tomorrow.

The ice had melted away, the snowy puddles had evaporated and the sky was a warm orange as the sun rose over the horizon. It was beautiful, but you didn’t have the time to bask in the sun as upon your waking you were ushered away. Out of the room you’d been moved to, closer to Wilbur once more, only a door away now. 

You were now being moved to the wedding suite. You would be given the night to adjust it to your liking before your husband joined you. He wouldn’t be allowed in until you gave your say so. And he wouldn’t get it until he saw you again.

An old tradition, but Wilbur wasn’t to see you again until the ceremony. You couldn’t say you weren’t grateful. You had a nice day planned, and you wanted to relish the last of your freedom. By the end of the next day you would be married and have a new title as the spouse of a duke. 

That came with new responsibilities. New chains to add to the shackles.

You have to hold yourself with a certain air now. The people in the estate expected a level of propriety that you hadn’t had to hold since becoming an adult. You’d been allowed to slack off as the child of a lord, and living here with Wilbur controlling everything as well. 

People now looked to you. They watched for a crack in the walls, or a moment they could use to fear you. It was nauseating.

All you wanted was to go back to how it used to be. 

Which is exactly why your last day was to be spent with your boys. Tommy and Tubbo had been given permission to skip out on spending the day with Wilbur to give you some friends to plan a small party. 

They had been so hyper, and even more excitable to have the opportunity. Apparently it had been a long while since any large events had been held. Since the engagement ball in fact.

Everyone still seemed nervous about that. With how horribly the last event had ended extra security was placed around the estate and even more was planned to guard the ceremony itself. No one wanted a repeat, Wilbur least of all, so he had Techno by his side to avoid another plan. 

It burned at you, the idea that there would be no chance for an escape, but you press at the flame until it lies in embers. You were supposed to be happy. 

It was supposed to be your day, dripping in jewels and fine silks, the love of your life on your arm and a new crown at your temple. You could see the moment now, muffled applause, the sun shining down on the happy couple, but no matter what you could not see yourself truly happy unless there was a change in spouse.

You only find yourself smiling at the idea when bare cheeks are covered in rough stubble and coarse hair. Until glasses are replaced with warm eyes and smile lines. Until the grip on your wrist was moved to a hand on your waist.

Only smiling when your favorite smile is aimed at you. Just a bit too bright and a boisterous laugh accompanying it.

But he’s not yours anymore. That laughter is halfway across the sea by now and you’re happy about that. He was free.

You would do anything to keep it that way. Even force that smile when the moment came. Let yourself relax in arms just a bit too cold. A grip just a bit too tight. You would kiss him and melt into it like he was your twin flame.

You shake off the thoughts and force a fresh smile onto your lips. You can hear the nobles titter and gossip around you as you walk the halls. They are only to see the happy fiancé. They can glance over the teary eyes and the stuttered breathing to see what will make them happy. New leaders would be good for the duchy, no matter how kind and just Phil was, he had ruled for far too long on his own. The people would be happy to see him retire.

As would you.

He deserved a break. Despite not seeing his son’s slow descent, he had been such a caring man to you. He saw your struggle and thought it was an adjustment thing, he’d offered so much help but you had never taken it. So none of this could be pinned on him.

He was the one who let Tommy off so often so you could spend time with him. So you would honestly do so much for the man.

You blink back to the present as you look into the room you would spend the next week residing in, both tonight and after the wedding.

It seemed so cold. It fit your mood about the event to a T, so you let your shoulders fall and relax into the understanding arms of it. 

It was rather bland, so you get to work. If you wanted to make the most of your last night, this would have to be done now. A maid had left the chest of decoration and homely items by the door, and you got to work immediately. 

You find solace in the work, and it's easy to get lost in it.

———————

Tommy and Tubbo now drag you laughing into the gardens. They demand all your attention despite having blindfolded you and won’t tell you a single thing about their plans.

It was sweet, how they bickered and kept you from falling over. Telling you of every uneven stone, or bump in the carpets. The care they showed warmed you to the tips of your fingers and toes. It makes it easy to remember you won’t always be frozen solid and numb. They always had your back.

“Branch!” Tommy yelps and then cackles when Tubbo walks into it, then holding it back so you wouldn’t suffer the same fate.

“Tommyyyy! You have to be better at warning me, I could’ve died!” Tubbo whines and you stifle soft laughter.

“Don’t care, we have to get there before sundown!” You imagine Tubbo nods in response, but you just have to smile and follow as they tug you along the rest of the way.

The blindfold is taken down with gentle hands. No matter how rough the two played, or how loud and brash they can be they were surprisingly soft with you. 

From Tommy the kindness was presented in acts of service and distraction. He would never say a harsh word to you, too used to his brothers cutting remarks and knowing how you’d suffered from them to add any more fuel to that fire.

From Tubbo it was always kind touches. The way he would check over your hands for new wounds, and never pushing or pulling too roughly. He had a healer’s hand and a soft touch to rival a mother’s. 

You have to blink against the harsh light of the sunset. The sky is a warm red and pink over a beautiful garden. Blankets had been sprawled across the grass and low branches trees were already being scaled by Tommy. 

It was exactly what you wanted.

You could see the ocean from here, though not very well. And the food smells fresh, bringing warm memories of home. You sit down against a tree and let Tommy babble at you and Tubbo as you all eat sweets and drink far too much juice.

“I think the party would be so much better if we’re allowed to set fire to things. Wilbur is such a bore” Tommy whines as he hangs upside down.

“Very boring, I agree, but what would make it even better? If you were allowed to show off your sword skills!” Tubbo tacks on, mouth full of sweet bread.

It was perfect. 

They were everything you’d needed tonight. Their laughter makes it easy to ignore the hole in heart, filling it at least temporarily with a soft easy familial love that you hoped to never grow cold to.

In their voices you hear Connor and Alex, poking fun at you and J… so you let yourself pretend. 

Pretend it’s all of them and you were getting married to him tomorrow instead.

You don’t realize the tears have started falling until you hear a warm voice.

“Uh, I thought this was supposed to be a party Tommy, I didn’t sneak away for this.”

Techno had joined and you smile softly. It breaks you from your daydream but you can’t be mad. The tears are wiped away and you don’t let yourself fall back into it. 

You just spend the night laughing with your boys, the night turning dark and the wind growing chilly. Candles keep it light enough for you all to stay out until the wee hours before dawn. None of wanting to break the moment and realize what today really was.

The wedding was today.

———————

A ship is docked not so very far away. Three men say goodbye to their temporary crew mate as he departs to join his husband for the wedding. 

All three stay up until the dawn, planning and Re planning for every occasion. They weren’t going to let this be the end. 

A family wasn’t meant to be separated, and found family even less so. None could bear the thought of losing you for much longer. It would be bloody, but very worth it. 

The wedding wouldn’t be happening today.

Not if they had a say in it.


	26. The wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ooo wedding day! Who’s excited?

The room was still cold, but you had a fire crackling across the room. Not that you were near enough to feel the warmth, but the blankets and pillows nestled around you chased away what cold wanted to sink in and keeps you cradled in that half sleep state even after the sun had risen. 

You didn’t want to wake and you knew exactly why. Maids would be on you the instant you opened the door to dress you and prepare you for the rest of the day. You would have no break from the moment you get up to the moment these doors closed once more that night.

Not that Wilbur being there would make rest easy. In fact, the idea of sharing a room for him was unsettling. No more would your room be an escape from his unrelenting grip. 

You bury your face in the pillow to ignore the idea and groan softly. Light was starting to trickle and crawl over your eyes. Soon you’d be forced to get up, whether you wanted to or not. Just as you were considering pulling the blankets aside the door creaks open with some argumentative mumbling.

“No, we wanted to give them breakfast. Shoo-“

“Tommy hush, they might still be sleeping!” 

It was your boys. You can’t stop the smile that curls up when you realize that. They wouldn’t let you be alone today. Of course not.

It’s Tommy that bounces onto the bed when he hears your laugh. Tubbo can’t join as he’s carrying a tray of food. Half burnt eggs, bread slathered in butter, and you’re not exactly sure it could be called porridge with how runny whatever was in the bowl was.

But it was perfect.

“Happy wedding day! We wanted to give you good morning before anyone else!” Tubbo smiles as the three of you pick at the breakfast.

“Of course we did! We’re your favorites, who better to wake you.” Tommy preens when you agree with him and Tubbo laughs.

Breakfast can only last so long and soon enough the maids do force their way inside. Tommy whines and complains but reluctantly leaves after much pushing and prodding.

It wasn’t like they could help you get ready, not that you wouldn’t love that. The idea of Tommy getting lost in the piles of fabric unable to pick which other went first.

You manage to hold onto that thought and smile your way through the dressing. You are pulled tight into clothes, hair pulled into perfect styles and pins pushed in to keep it in place. It was a normally painful experience but you push through it with a grin. You would not let this day turn sour so quickly. 

Wilbur would be mad if you presented as anything other than happy and perfect.

So you would do what he wanted. Stiff posture, a light smile, eyes warm and full of joy. The image kept flashing in your mind of what he wanted, and you cling to it, trying to associate it with what you want as well.

You wanted to be married.  
You wanted to be married to him.  
Be his happy spouse.  
Be a good leader and a kind one.

They were good goals to have. So you would follow through with them against all your previous hope you would fall willingly into these roles. The cage bars would thicken, and you would sing just as prettily behind them, because you chose this.

You chose everything you are about to walk into.

————————

Guards are at every corner throughout the day. There was not a moment you were alone. You weren’t even alone with your soon to be family either. When Techno comes to wish you luck there is a guard at every window. You both have to laugh at that and it lessens the tension ever so slightly. He does however hug tighter than ever before when he has to depart. He knew that this was likely to end exactly how Wilbur wanted.

Phil’s visit is different. He looks tired, but he still smiles at you. He compliments you with a soft chuckle and lets his hand rest in yours.

“I’m happy to be considered your father soon. I couldn’t want anything more for Wilbur” his voice is soft and you can’t help but tear up.

He immediately moves to dab under your eyes with a handkerchief and his eyes grow worried. It was like he was finally seeing how battered you’d become.

“I’m sorry.. please don’t cry. You’ll be good for the people, and for Wil. I know you’ll make each other better.” He still couldn’t admit it, but you can see that he’s starting to understand. Maybe techno could get through to him sometime soon. 

Not in time to fix this, but soon enough that you wouldn’t be alone in suffering for long.

It’s bittersweet when he leaves. You knew it meant the ceremony was starting soon, but it also meant that the day was almost over as well.

You spend your last few minutes staring out a window at the horizon, keeping a smile on your face even as tears slide down it. Hopefully it would pass as joy when you stepped out.

A soft and sweet chord plays from the distance and you are ushered to your feet. You know the music must be perfect to everyone else, but to you it sounds discordant and imperfect. It does not fit the true emotion behind this wedding. You would have much preferred a military march to this soft romantic lilt. You knew it was for images, but you could not help but wish for it to change with your first step down the aisle.

Your gaze is down for the first few steps, anxiety creeping up your throat at all the eyes on you. You didn’t want to look up to see him, so when you do look up you look to the guests. 

You see your parents, happiness apparent at their smiles and teary eyes.

You see Tommy and Tubbo craning their necks and standing up to see you with big thumbs up and supportive smiles.

Phil stands at the pulpit with the same tired smile, but it brightens when he sees you coming up the aisle.

Techno stands behind Wil with a blank look. You couldn’t tell if it was comfort, disappointment, or sadness in his eyes when he meets yours, but you smile in return nonetheless.

King George and Dream catch your eyes from the pews, watching with all the grace the royal couple should, but Dream catches your eye and smiles wider than you’d ever seen him. It hurt somewhat, seeing that, but not as much as the next eyes you are forced to catch as the music crescendos.

You and Wilbur lock eyes and you can’t help but notice how happy he is to watch you walk into your own fate. How relaxed he can be when this is your whole future. How smug his eyes are when he catches the slip of your smile for the briefest of seconds. He knows he has you. 

His hands grasp yours, first clinging and harsh, but it goes soft in moments. He doesn’t have to fight to keep you. In his eyes you are already his. It’s why you can’t stand to look in his eyes as Phil starts to speak. You can’t stand to look at your hands joined either. It’s just too soft for this moment. 

You look out to the crowd as Wilbur and Phil exchange words. “I do’s” echo in your head but you can’t force yourself to care.

Your eyes meet a familiar pair in the back. What looks like Alex smiles brightly at you, too real for what you know to be hallucination.

You flick away, begging to see someone real only to see Connor at the side of the venue. He doesn’t immediately look up to you, checking over tools in his belt but he smiles too when he looks up. Why must you hurt yourself like this with hope. You start to cry and pull your eyes away to complete your half of the declarations.

“I do’s” fall from your lips at every required interval, but you feel fuller at every word. You feel like shrinking and slinking into yourself but Wilbur’s hands keep you tied to this moment. You would do anything to not be here so you look to the audience once more.

You know Phil is now reading scripts before asking for objections you know won’t come. It slides to the background as your eyes meet another pair you feel aren’t real. He was in the back, smiling much too confidently and teasing you with hope. J stands and raises a hand. 

When a gasp goes through the crowd you find it harder to dismiss as a fiction. 

When Wilbur digs his hands into your wrists you blink at the person now stepping forward with that smug cocky expression and he doesn’t fade.

The final chord is struck when he opens his mouth and that voice you’ve missed so much tumbles out and it’s real. It was him.

“I object. On the grounds that Wilbur is not a suitable husband and that I love them.”

Tears slide down your face and you can’t help but feel weak at the knees.

“I love you little one, couldn’t let you get married without me.”


	27. The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I cried a little writing this chapter, it’s been such a great story and you are all amazing readers. I’m going to miss this story. Thank goodness for the epilogue.

The first thing to happen is Wilbur’s scream. It’s pure rage and it physically hurts to be so close to the source of it. He sounds like some ancient warrior who has finally met the straw to break the camel's back. What’s worse is he doesn’t let go of you. You can feel your hands being crushed until he has clarity long enough to shove you behind his back. You ache to run to the man in the aisle but you would never get off the platform.

Guards try to rush in and you think this might be the end. Not even a chance to be in his arms at least for a moment. You struggle against the hands holding you but before you can even beg Wilbur to stop this a few things tumble into place.

Alex and Connor first off. They already have blades and traps set to keep quite a few men down and distracted. The few that slip through the cracks start bolting through the crowd but J still does not waver in his approach.

Tommy and Tubbo take care of a few guards of there own. Tommy is in no way incompitant with a sword thanks to Techno and he uses it, along with Tubbo’s distractions to incapacitate a few more men. You almost want to shout with joy but the noise turns to a whimper when Wilbur turns to you and starts moving to pick you up. 

“Techno! Do something!” Wilbur whines as you struggle against him. Before you can even look up to see if he’d listened your gaze is pulled away by another struggle in the crowd.

Dream was standing on one of the seats and was fighting three different guards with a ridiculous smile on his face. He was definitely having more fun than you were and you would laugh if you hadn’t been hoisted up right at that moment.

Seeing the chaos unfold was both amazing and agonizing. You could do nothing from Wilbur’s arms and he was going to run away. Tears pool in your eyes and you free a hand to reach out.

It’s not much but you reach towards J, still struggling and fighting despite the tight hold on you. His eyes flash with panic and he bolts forward, all bravery pushed to the side to reach you.

Techno looks between the two sides and rolls his eyes. Of course Schlatt had no weapon, and techno couldn’t fight his own brother. The glint of steel in the air is the only warning Schlatt gets to catch the weapon.

It’s such a beautiful moment when he does, and you let out some soft noise of joy, causing Wilbur to turn and scowl to see what had unfolded. 

Phil had already been shuffled out when the panic had set in, so he wasn’t there to keep Wilbur in check. It takes less than a second for him to drop your legs, pull you against his chest like a shield, and brandish his own sword. All hope shrivels up at that and you just sink into his arms. You’ve learned not to fight against him at this point, with a blade so close to your face you are reminded of their last fight.

The phantom pain forces tears to fall down your cheeks and you can do nothing but watch as the two stare down each other.

“Let them go, this isn’t right.” Schlatt doesn’t waver, his eyes flicking back and forth between the blade and you.

“LIKE YOU WOULD KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT! YOU’RE A VILLAIN- A MURDERER! YOU DON'T DESERVE THEM LIKE I DO!” You whimper when his hold grows tighter. He was acting a fool and his face was red. The possessive actions had guests gaping in distress.

“You’re right, I don’t deserve them. But you deserve them even less. I cannot think of another person that has hurt them more than you.” The calm frustrates wilbur more and he yells for a guard.

“SHUT UP! YOU ARE WRONG, I LOVE THEM AND THEY'RE MINE!” He shoves his face into your neck and you whimper, closing your eyes against the sight of Schlatt’s hurt expression. The low whisper though is what hurts the most. 

“If you don’t agree with me I’ll make your life a living hell.” 

Like he hadn’t done that already.

Like standing here in his arms was the highlight of your life.

Like every ache and pain and struggle in your life wasn’t directly caused by him.

It strikes a chord in you and you stomp on his foot and elbow into his ribs. The tears burn, not with resignation now, but with your own rage. He did not get to threaten you and still say he loved you in the same breath. You manage to push away from him, but not without a slice across your cheek.

You stumble to stand between the two men, looking to all witnesses like a fury from hell. Your hair comes loose from the tight styles after all the struggling and the fire in your eyes is brighter than the sun when you spin to face your fiancé. The man you’d almost married.

“You do NOT get the right to threaten my life, when you already have made the perfect hell without trying.” You spit the words like venom and Wilbur has the sense to at least flinch back at your sudden show of aggression. 

“I don’t belong to you, I don’t belong to anyone-“

“But doe, I need you. I need you more than air, you’re my everything!” He plays the victim. The pet name sickens you and you turn to face J.

You ignore Wilbur’s whines and raging as you fall into J’s arms. He was warm and safe and the way he holds you is so gentle and caring that you block out the rest of the room to look up and press your forehead to his.

“I missed you too little one…” you both smile until the sound of metal against metal drags you back.

“NO! THEYRE MY LITTLE ONE, MY DOE, MY SPOUSE!” The victim is gone, replaced by bluster and whining. He was getting trite at this point and you turn your head to let J see to defend with the sword.

“You don’t get to call me yours.”

“It’s our wedding day! We were almost married! Why did he have to ruin everything! Take my spouse, my life, my fucking title!” He stomps and whines, too focused on the two of you to notice techno pulling Phil along to witness his meltdown.

“Those aren’t yours! You didn’t earn them! You don’t own me, you don’t even love me. You just need me for power” he surges forward.

The blade is no longer aimed at Schlatt, instead aimed at you. The rage had boiled over after denying him for so long. You don’t have time to react but Schlatt does, his sword moving quickly to defend you.

“If I can’t have you, then neither can he!” You have the sense to duck out of Schlatt’s arms and step back, forcing Wilbur to turn and give a moment before he can make his next attack.

Before he can, a hand grips his arm and his arm is stopped. However it is not the hand he expects.

Phil is looking sadly at his son, but the firm grip confirms that he is not on his side anymore. Wilbur drops his arm and finally you notice the tears in his eyes.

“I’m putting a stop to this Wil. You aren’t stable enough.” As they speak you are pulled into J’s arms, his face buried in your hair, as if he can’t believe you’re here. 

“Dad- Phil please.. I deserve this.. please” the begging is quiet but Phil just shakes his head and motions Technoblade over.

“I’m making it official. You can’t inherit my title. Techno will whenever he’s ready.” Wilbur struggles at this and when techno wraps his arms around his younger brother he fights against it.

“No! It’s mine! Please! I did so much, why can’t it be mine-“ he’s pulled away and the room is now left mostly silent. The chaos that had filled it calmed within moments of Phil speaking up.

Guests had left, guards working to patch each other up, and those that had caused most of the chaos stand watching with tired but proud smiles.

You and J both look up when Phil clears his throat. He is also smiling, no matter how tired he is. 

“So. That was quite the event, from what Techno told me you don’t deserve the criminal title, Schlatt.” J shrugs, unwilling to interrupt the duke.

“Well, I think I can give you a pardon, as you’ve proven my son an unworthy leader before he was able to cause chaos for L’manburg.” Phil smiles and puts a hand on Schlatt’s shoulder.

“You two should catch up, and maybe get some of these hooligans out of here, hmm?”

————————

You end up leaving the venue with Schlatt, Alex, Connor, Tommy, and Tubbo. Dream had declined the offer to leave with his husband. A country couldn’t run itself. 

The five of you end up on the ship. The gentle rocking accompanies the light laughter and Jokes that come with having normalcy returned. As well as having the younger boys aboard. It takes a while, but eventually schlatt pulls you aside, ducking into the bunk room and hugging you tight to his chest.

“I’m so glad you’re back, I’m so sorry, I never should have let him take you. Never in a million years.” He presses soft kisses over your face, trying to make up for lost time.

“It’s not your fault, you couldn’t have known-“

“I know but still…” he pulls away to caress your face and smile down at you, “I don’t know how I ever lived without you.” 

You let that sit and hug him tightly. It was a perfect moment once more. No more hole in your chest, no more pain or panic, just happiness.

“Little one… would you sail with me? I know you have responsibilities, but I love you so much. I don’t ever want to leave your side again-“

“Can we bring the boys?” You interrupt, the boys in question already causing chaos with Alex and Connor on the deck. J laughs and presses a kiss to your forehead.

“You convince the old man, but I’d be willing to bring anyone along if you came too.” 

You smile, soft and content before leaning up to kiss him.

He was your happy ending. 

He was your prince.

He was the easy love and chaotic life you craved.

You weren’t going anywhere and neither was he.

He was a choice, but a choice you would make over and over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed, be on the lookout for some side story fics in the future, there is so much about this world that I didn’t get to explore and I can’t wait to share it with you.


End file.
